More funny statements by surgeons

  1. I started a thread some time ago about surgeons making statements, giving directions to their residents, or comments that they made during surgery that made the staff snicker. I would love to keep this going and hear from the rest of you. I think what makes this so hilarious is that the surgeons don't realize how funny their statements are when taken out of the context of the surgery itself.

    I was scrubbed in doing a lap inguinal hernia with a surgeon the other day. He was teaching his resident how to manipulate the hernia sac. He said, "Dude, just grab your sac and move it to the left to try to free it up." Here I was trying to keep a straight face and concentrate on the surgery. I somehow held it together until the circulating nurse asked the attending if he wanted to send the hernia sac to pathology. He said, "No, I don't think so." I couldn't help it...I said, "Oh, so you aren't going to send your freed up sac to get inspected?" At that point the attending understood why I was laughing so hard and replied, "I don't want some stranger inspecting my sac."

    Oh, the joys of surgery!
  2. Visit canesdukegirl profile page

    About canesdukegirl, BSN

    Joined: Jul '10; Posts: 2,897; Likes: 7,170
    OR nursing; from US
    Specialty: 14 year(s) of experience in Trauma Surgery, Nursing Management


  3. by   Surgery182
    The other day a resident was feeling a mass and stated, "I've never felt one so big before!" I quickly replied, "That's what she said!"
  4. by   BridgetJones
    Maybe not totally on topic with this thread but I thought it was funny...

    Surgeon: Can we have a couple stools over here, please? (Referring to the rolling things you sit on.) :ause:: I like the soft brown ones.

    Me: Sorry, all we have are the tarry black ones.

    Scrub (laughing): Can you push that stool in for me?

    Me: I thought you were supposed to push stools out!

    And on it went.
  5. by   Surgery182
    We are suppose to send all explanted hardware to the pathologist for gross ID. The other day she received some screws in a plastic biohazard bag that had punched through. Today the pathologist called. Pathologist: "Please tell your staff to double bag their screws."
  6. by   IsseyM
    Ortho case. Resident was messing around with screw and i think he said something like, "Push it in more so I can get a better view of head."
  7. by   Surgery182
    Distal radius case today...Surgeon says, "How does that shaft look?" Well Doc I don't really swing that way but it looks ok to me.
  8. by   ORoxyO
    We have these ortho leg holders that require the circulator to pull a lever down and tighten a top piece under the drapes and after the tourniquet goes up. Today while working with very good looking young doctor:

    Dr- "Hey Roxy, will you yank my rod for me?
    Me, giggling "Of course I'll yank on your rod, I thought you'd never ask".

    It went downhill from there.
  9. by   Lorodz
    OMG this is so funny!
  10. by   canesdukegirl
    Oh yeah, the OR can be a very funny place to work!

    My co-workers know that I am hearing impaired, but I honestly thought that I heard this exchange correctly:

    Anesthesiologist to another anesthesiologist at the front desk: "Dude, you gonna be done with fellatio soon?"

    The other anesthesiologist: "Aw, man! No way! I still have a long way to go!" He chuckles as he walks away.

    I was the charge nurse that day and our holding area is completely open so that the OR front desk can monitor which pt's are getting ready for surgery. This particular anesthesiologist is known for breaching the lines of inappropriateness and I was BESIDE myself because we were recently addressed by our NM about inappropriate conversations within earshot of pts. Apparently, a pt's family member was in the waiting area when they overheard two nurses talking about how wasted they got last weekend and the family member reported it to our CEO. Needless to say, I wanted to nip this in the bud.

    Me: "Dr. X! There are PATIENTS in the holding area! Can you conduct yourself in a professional manner, please?!? ESPECIALLY while you are at the front desk of the OR! We are all representatives of this hospital and we need to reflect the values of the hospital. Would YOU be happy to hear this kind of talk if you were sitting in the holding area with your mother, who needs to find some comfort in the professionalism of the people taking care of her while she is under anesthesia? Do you think that she would be confident that the nurses and doctors would be her advocate when the last thing she hears is a comment like that?!?!? " OH, I was HOT!! I dressed him up one side and down the other, telling him that I won't hesitate for one skinny minute about reporting him to the chairman.

    The whole time I was talking, his expression went from surprised to confused and then to smug, which made me even MORE angry. When I was done, he said, "Uh...Canes? Calm down. I asked him if he was going to be done with his fellowship soon. What exactly did YOU hear?", knowing full well that I had mis-heard him.

    I desperately wished for the floor to crack open wide right under my feet so I could disappear. I was the butt of jokes for MONTHS after this.