Oncology ? Hysterectomy->Surrogate ???

[zambezi, BSN, RN]

Some of you may have read the thread regarding a cone biopsy that I had to have done a few weeks back...thankfully that procedure went fine. I got the results back and now I am in a dilemma that will change the rest of my life and I am torn (thankfully I have a fantastic support group and a wonderful husband). I orininally had the biopsy for severe dysplasia/CIS...thankfully the biopsy showed that all the margins are clear, no invasice cancer etc...however, they found a section of the biopsy that showed adenocarcinoma in situ (not invasive CA). The risk with this is that it does not spread in an organized fashion (to my understanding) and that even though the margins were clear, it may still be there. AT this point, the doctor pretty much said that the recommendation is hysterectomy because adenocarcinoma is very tricky, fairly aggressive, has a fairly high mortality rate if it becomes invasive, and is not easily detectable. It could have all been removed, but there is a chance that it has not (it was detected near but not across two margins).

If I had children, I would not hesitate to have the surgery (at least I get to keep my ovaries). However, I am 26 years old. I have always wanted to have children. My doctor said that if we want to conceive we have to start now. When I deliver then it will be hysterectomy time (which I am ok with). I am fit and healthy...no other medical problems...

There in lies the dilemma. It kills me to think of not having at least one child. I get emotional everytime I think about it. But is it worth my life??...I would not want my husband to have an infant child and not me. But that pull to try is so strong, I just have never pictured my life without at least one child. We were planning to start trying this year...

We have been considerding a surrogate mother. I did have a friend offer... but we may be more interested in having a third party that we don't know...I did read the last thread on surrogacy and it brought up questions that I hadn't thought of....Adoption, while I love the idea of it, isn't for us.

We have a couple of weeks to decide the plan of action. The biopsy results have been send for a second opinion to a place that specializes in gyn oncology. The worst part is is that the CIS/AIS may be gone. It may have been completely removed in the biopsy. I may be fine. But if not, it is a big gamble. And there is no way to know...

So how's that for personal info over the internet? It does feel good to type it out though. I just got the news yesterday so it is still sinking in. As I said before, I have a fantastic support system which I know I am lucky to have. And, thankfully, it was not invasive CA. It is a very bittersweet situation.

Does anyone have any info on adenocarcinoma? (Besides the basic google search)

Please share your experiences with surrogacy...Does anyone have experience with it. What are the typical costs involved? I have so much research I need to do...

The hysterectomy part feels like the least of my concerns at this point but any information or experiences, of course, are appreciated.

Thanks in advance...

[sydie]

I can't imagine the fear you must have. I can help you with some info regarding surrogacy. I attempted to be a gestational surrogate for a friend of mine in Nov 2004 & Jan 2005. Our first frozen transfer was not successful and the second one resulted in a pregnancy that ultimately ended in a miscarriage. Please PM me and I will give you my home email address so I can give more info, such as cost and good resources.

Wendy

[Sadie04]

I'm sorry to hear of your dilemma. Good luck in making this decision. :)

[KRVRN, BSN, RN]

I work NICU and have chatted with families that have used surrogates, so I have somewhat of an idea of the cost involved. (So I am not speaking from specific personal experience)

First of all, there is an amount of money paid to the surrogate for doing the procedure. Then, the parents-to-be have to be sure the surrogate has medical insurance, so that might mean buying her a separate policy (and covering involved copays and such). There is probably going to be a procedure to harvest eggs from you (or else a fee for a donated egg), and then IVF and implanting them into the surrogate. Of course infertility procedures may not work right away and ahve to be repeated. There may be a stipulation that more money is paid to the surrogate if the pregancy results in multiples. (I'm remembering a family that had triplets...) There may be a similar stipulation for if the delivery is via c-section. I don't know, but I would assume there would be costs involved with the legal paperwork as well. I get the impression that it approaches the tens of thousands of dollars. :stone

All that said, I wish you good luck. I am sorry to hear about your situation.

[DDRN4me]

zambesi, i am so sorry to hear about your situation. can the md do a hysteroscopy to look deeper for any more suspicious areas? i dont have any experience with surrogates so i wont go there. prayers are with you and your dh.

[zambezi, BSN, RN]

Thanks for the replies so far. Regarding the hysterscopy...I will definately ask but I have a feeling the answer will be no as the changes are insitu at this point (thank goodness) and would have to be biopsied and looked at by a pathologist to know for sure...Thanks for all of you thoughts...we are going for a second opinion by a gyn/oncologist to see if we can try for a pregnancy before a hysterectomy...