Onions and Tannenbaum...

  1. Onions and Christmas tree (the truth hurts...?)

    A young man asks his father, "Dad, how many kinds of breasts are there?

    The father, surprised, answers, "Well, son, there are three kinds of breasts.
    In her twenties, a woman's breasts are like melons, round and
    firm. In her thirties to forties, they are like pears, still nice but
    hanging a bit. After fifty, they are like onions."


    "Yes, see them and they make you cry."


    A young woman asks her mother, "Mom, how many kind of penises are there?"
    The mother, surprised, answers, "Well, daughter, a man goes
    through three phases. In a man's twenties, a man's penis is like an oak, mighty and hard. In his thirties and forties, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his fifties, it is like a Christmas tree."

    A Christmas tree?"

    "Yes, dried up and the balls are there for decoration only."
  2. Visit jnette profile page

    About jnette, ASN, EMT-I

    Joined: Aug '02; Posts: 21,359; Likes: 7,204
    Home Health Patient Education Resource Nurse; from US
    Specialty: 10 year(s) of experience in Hemodialysis, Home Health


  3. by   krispynurse
    Oh how that is so true
  4. by   Spidey's mom
    Onions! Yep, I'm crying. Still breastfeeding, but crying all the same. :chuckle
  5. by   nowplayingEDRN
    Hehehehehehehe, This was funny. I do believe that I fall into the pear stage of the game

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