Men are like... - page 2
Ok... sorry guys... this one was too funny & yes, I know someone is gonna get me back for this one! Men are like.....Laxatives. They irritate the crap out of you. Men are like.....Bananas.... Read More
Jan 9, '03Occupation: Student Joined: Dec '02; Posts: 1,778; Likes: 20I loved these! I sent the ones "women should know" to my best friend. He'll love them! :roll :roll BTW, I totally agree with ya Heather! Keep the funnies coming!
Jan 9, '03Occupation: Hospice nurse Joined: Dec '02; Posts: 24Originally posted by klhs
Ok... sorry guys... this one was too funny & yes, I know someone is gonna get me back for this one!
Men are like.....Laxatives. They irritate the crap out of you.
Men are like.....Bananas. The older they get, the less firm they are.
Men are like.....Vacations. They never seem to be long enough.
Men are like.....Bank Machines. Once they withdraw they lose interest.
Men are like.....Weather. Nothing can be done to change them.
Men are like.....Blenders. You need one, but you're not quite sure why= .
Men are like.....Cement. After getting laid, they take a long time to get hard.
Men are like.....Chocolate Bars. Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.
Men are like.....Coffee. The best ones are rich, warm, and can keep yo= u
up all night long.
Men are like.....Commercials. You can't believe a word they say.
Men are like.....Department Stores. Their clothes are always half off.
Men are like.....Government bonds. They take so long to mature.
Men are like.....Horoscopes. They always tell you what to do and are usually wrong.
Men are like.....Mascara. They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
Men are like.....Popcorn. They satisfy you, but only for a little while.
Men are like.....Snowstorms. You never know when they're coming, how
many inches you'll get or how long it will last.
Men are like.....Lava Lamps. Fun to look at, but not very bright.
Men are like.....Parking Spots. All the good ones are taken and the
rest are handicapped
Jan 9, '03Occupation: Hospice nurse Joined: Dec '02; Posts: 24Didn't mean to rewrite. But was worth it. Was ready to go to bed and had a gooood laugh. Thanks!!
Jan 14, '03Occupation: RN, Elderly Mental health Joined: Jun '01; Posts: 3,115; Likes: 51We try, but where does it get us!
A man asked his wife what she'd like for her 40th birthday.
I'd love to be six again," she replied.
On the morning of her birthday, he got her up bright and early and off they went to a local theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park: the Death Slide, the Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fear, everything there was! Wow!
Five hours later she staggered out of the theme park, her head reeling and her stomach upside down. Right to a McDonald's they went, where her husband ordered her a Happy Meal along with extra fries and a refreshing chocolate shake.
Then, it was off to a movie - the latest Disney and what a fabulous adventure!
Finally, she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed.
He leaned over and lovingly asked, "Well, dear, what was it like being six again?"
One eye opened. "You idiot, I meant my dress size."
The moral of this story is:
When a woman speaks and a man is actually listening, he will still get it wrong.
Jan 14, '03Occupation: Health Services Director for a 1100 bed county jail From: US ; Joined: Nov '02; Posts: 531; Likes: 4All are too funny!!! :roll