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nowplayingEDRN
799 Posts
I hope that this does not account for male bashing...but this is sooo funny!
Diet For Men
A fellow was ordered by his doctor to lose 75 lb., due to very serious
health risks. As he wondered how in the heck he would ever do it, he ran across
an ad in the newspaper for a GUARANTEED WEIGHT LOSS PROGRAM. "Guaranteed.
Yeah, right!" he thought to himself. But, desperate, he calls them up and subscribes to the 3-day/10-pound weight loss program.
The next day there's a knock at his door, and when he answers, there
stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19-year-old babe dressed in nothing
but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign round her neck. She introduces herself
as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads, "If you can
catch me, you can have me." Without a second thought he takes off after her.
A few miles later, huffing and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her. After they are through and she leaves, he thinks to himself, "I
like the way this company does business!" The same girl shows up for the
next two days and the same thing happens.
On the fourth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost
10 pounds, as promised. He calls the company and orders their 5-day/20-pound
program.
The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning,
beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life, wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch me, you can have me." He's out the door after her like a shot. This girl is in excellent shape and it takes him a while to catch her, but when he does, it is worth every cramp and wheeze. For the next four days, the same routine happens and much to his delight, on the fifth day he weighs himself and found he has lost another 20 pounds, as promised.
He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50-pound
program. "Are you sure?", asks the representative on the phone. "This is
our most rigorous program."
"Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years." The next day
there's a knock at the door and when he opens it he finds Richard Simmons
standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his
neck that reads, "If I catch you, you're mine