Things you'd LOVE to be able to tell patients, and get away with it. - page 114

:spin:Just curious as to what you would say. Mine goes something like this: Hi, my name is AngelfireRN, I'll be your nurse tonight. I am not a waitress, nor am I your slave. Yelling... Read More

  1. by   sirI
    Guys, guys, gals, gals...........please, let's stop personalizing things.

    This is a vent thread. Period. It's not to judge others for what they say here. If one finds comments (that are within our TOS) irritating, please bypass the thread.

    It's better to vent here, receive support and return to provide the best care for our patients that we can.

    Carry on...
  2. by   Virgo_RN
    To the not very sick morbidly obese patient c/o "choking" on a piece of chicken while sitting there talking to me without any difficulty, who I have just interrupted care of a very sick person for because I heard that you were choking and came running:

    "No, I will not perform the heimlich maneuver on you. Why not? Well, your eyes are open and you're talking to me, so you're not choking. You want to call 911? Well, we ARE 911, but I suppose you have to do what you have to do. Where's your phone? You're sitting on it."

    Actually, I did say that.
  3. by   Virgo_RN
    The ED is not a primary care physician for dear old Dad! You have to stop bringing the poor old demented fella in every time he hiccups! We'll just have to poke him with needles and stick a tube in his urethra to collect urine, neither of which he is a fan of, nor does he comprehend why this is being done to him. Make an appointment with his doctor, for cripes' sake!
  4. by   Virgo_RN
    Oh, it's you again. What now?
  5. by   ChicagoPeds
    Quote from AprilRNhere
    And yet....."May I offer your *insert family member* an ativan?" would be SUCH a nice option wouldn't it?
    There are many times that we joke among ourselves about that one.....hehehe. Should give Mom some valium or ativan...would make the day so much better
  6. by   sirI
    Please note post #1470.

    Posts that do not heed this redirect have been and will be removed so we can keep this thread open.

    Thank you.
  7. by   sharpeimom
    you again? we just discharged you day before came to the nurses station last night when you came to visit your aunt and requested pain meds when she had been fine all day:imbar ......... and, now,
    here you are again in the er...

  8. by   SunnyAndrsn
    I have a resident who insists on "culligan water." We have water dispensers in all three dining rooms, and she is sure that this is "culligan water." It's just hooked into the plumbing, it's no different than the tap in her bathroom, or in the kitchen. She's sure it tastes different.

    Another one wants two claritin a day, she knows that is the key to her allergies. It started out with a PRN claritin order, got changed to scheduled every day, and now she wants two. "One doesn't work for me." No signs or symptoms of allergies...she's ****** off that the MD won't order it for her and wants her to try something else since this isn't working. Family insists we are ignoring her, and insists that her allergies are "horrible". They walked in from having a smoke break and she sneezed. Guess what? I did too, the smoke smell was disgusting, cloying, and gag worthy.

    I had another one call from home at 1am to ask us to give her dad his PRN albuterol neb and mucinex because it had been four hours. Um, no wheezing, no congestion, clear lungs sounds, and no stuffy nose. He was sleeping peacefully and I told her no, I would not be giving him those medications because my assessment showed he did not need them. She told me she was trying to prevent him from getting sick...again SHE WAS AT HOME. She was pretty mad at me that I wouldn't jack her dad's heartrate up in the middle of the night with an un-needed neb. He had the mucinex order and albuterol order per her request in the first place.

    Another one was upset that she needed to see her MD two days after discharge from the LTC to get a written 'script for her diluadid. She had enough left for the weekend, but that was it. The discharging MD was not going to be following her and would not write a paper 'script. She tried to tell me she called Walgreen's and they were filling it. I told her that I had to call in her 'scripts, that the diluadid would not be filled because she didn't have a paper 'script...that she had to see her primary. She then called the clinic on a Saturday afternoon, and told me "that nurse said you just have to call them and the doctor will write the 'script." Um no, you talked to the answering service, not a nurse. "But she told me..." My reply, "she told you wrong!!!" BOTTOM LINE, YOU WILL NOT BE GETTING MORE DILUADID THIS WEEKEND!!!!!!!!!!

    I'm not the personal assistant to your MD, I do not have access to their daily schedules, nor do I want to have that information, I have enough trouble with my own daily schedule, thank you very much. This is not the Lido Deck, my name is not Julie, and I'm not in chage of your daily schedule. Don't like the meal options? Complain to the kitchen, not me. I'm a nurse, not a chef. This is not the Hilton. Yeah, the plastic pillow suck but it's infection control--don't throw them at me because I'll just take it out of the room and give it to someone who actually wants an extra pillow.

    Don't like how slow the CNAs are? Well if you weren't so nasty to them maybe it would be a pleasure to care for you and they'd rush to the room like they do to some of the others. Don't like that you have to have the mechanical lift for transfers? Stop refusing therapy.

    Quote from AngelfireRN
    :spin:Just curious as to what you would say. Mine goes something like this:

    Hi, my name is AngelfireRN, I'll be your nurse tonight.

    I am not a waitress, nor am I your slave.

    Yelling and hurling obscenities at me will not get you your pain meds any sooner than they are ordered. Nor will having your family member or entourage do the same.

    Threatening lawsuits and having umpteen family members camp out in the halls or hold up the nurse's station will not get you preferential treatment.

    Physically grabbing me as I go down the hall is NOT a good idea.

    I do not give the orders, but I do have to follow/enforce them. This is something that you should take up with your doctor.

    No, I will not call him again to ask him for more pain medicine. He has been called twice and has said no both times.

    No, I will not give you his number so you can "straighten him out".

    No, you are not my only patient, and i highly doubt that you are single-handedly paying my salary. On the off chance that you are, let's talk about a raise.

    NO, NO, NO, i most empahatically will NOT come get you when it is time for your next pain shot while you are having a smoke break. I also will not bring it to you in the smoking room. (Have actually said that, I am allergic to cigarettes. I did it once, had an asthma attack, desatted to 83, and turned blue, according to the patient and my charge nurse, after the patient had to help me back to the floor).

    No, I don't really care if your family has not eaten all day, they drove here by themselves, they are not sick, and no, I will not call for 6 guest trays. (This of course, is if the patient in question does not need all 6 family members present, and is not at death's door).

    No, you may not have 3 six-packs of soda from the kitchen, there are other people that would like a snack, too.

    No, they will not open up the kitchen up just for you, at 1 in the morning, because you don't like the snacks we have on the floor.

    I could think of hundreds, but those will do for a start. I know it sounds mean, but this is why I got out of bedside nursing. When a hospital becomes the Hilton, I'm gone!!!
    Have fun!
  9. by   AngelfireRN
    sirI, thank you and thank you AGAIN.
    Last edit by sirI on Nov 22, '09
  10. by   teeniebert
    I realize you like to keep late hours, and that is your right, but I need to get my work done. My shift ends at 11. If you ask me at 10:45 to 'come back later' with your meds, after asking the same thing at 9:30 and 10:00, I might just document 'refused after 3 attempts'. And yes, I DO have to stand here and watch while you take them.
  11. by   freefalr
    varying things with the same general underlying sentiments:
    "SHUT UP!!!!"
    "GO AWAY!!!!"
  12. by   nursynurseRN
    You came here becasue this was the closest trauma hospital. Yes you can leave just sign out AMA, i don't care.
  13. by   pinkgator
    HAHAHAHAHAHA love it!