I'm a new nurse at my first RN job. I work in a large urban hospital in the Midwest. We are a level 1 trauma center so we can be quite busy. I work on a neurology floor that also acts like a med surg unit as well. I have been off orientation approximately 6 months. I love my coworkers (I work on the night shift) and I have had decent success there (my patients like me, or so my leads have said, and I was nominated for a Daisy award at the three month mark which was pretty cool).
Unfortunately, I'm miserable.
I specifically sought out a med surg floor because teachers and relatives who are nurses said that med surg is a great place for new grads to start in order to learn time management, assessment skills, etc. I had zero interest in med surg in school (it was my least favorite clinical rotation as a matter of fact). I was happier in ICU and oncology.
My biggest issues with my current gig are the nurse patient ratio and the pace. Also, many of our patients are very trying (since we're neuro we get a lot of dementia patients who can become violent, plus we get a decent amount of everybody's favorites: alcohol detoxers and narcotic seekers).
I had been having a really rocky start to my career: getting out of the door on time had been an impossibility for me until recently since I was always behind on charting. That has improved, but not by much.
In short, I feel like my job is too much, too fast. My coworkers are beyond awesome in how helpful and friendly they are, but I'm definitely the weakest link on that floor. I simply cannot get a grasp on the pacing, the multitasking and keeping track of everything that needs to be done with my patients. It's nerve-wracking to the point where I feel nauseous and feel my chest tightening on the drive in.
I'm sorry if this turned into a gripe session, I didn't mean for it too. I'm simply frustrated and feel trapped. What other options are there for me at this point? I'd love to have a lower nurse/patient ratio (wouldn't everyone?). I've considered OR, PACU, ICU, among other options. I just think it would be a red flag for hiring managers if they saw that I left my current job in under a year.
I feel like I can't 'hack it' here. I didn't want my job to feel like simply surviving for 12 hours, but that's where I'm at. I've had to stop myself from snapping at my more obnoxious patients as well (never looks good on a 'How did we do?' survey when the RN tears into the patient).
Advice welcome and appreciated. This is my second career and I don't want to back out now. I'm not a stranger to hard work, but this is beyond me.
You know what? You are describing a pretty normal first year. And, to coin a phrase, it gets better.
You are, in fact, getting better-- you said so yourself, your charting is getting more efficient. I'll bet dollars to doughnuts that if you look at it dispassionately you're better at a lot of those things new grads always tell us they are "terrified" about doing or not having experience doing; you're getting better. You are learning a "tremendous" amount and you really like that; words I wish we heard from new grads more often!
So you think you're the weakest link on the floor-- so what? Who else would you expect to be in that spot if not the new grad with the least experience? But you say your patients and coworkers love you, which tells me you're not a total screw-up, they see themselves at your stage in you, and they are nominating you for an award as a recognition and encouragement to help you get through this challenging period in your very early career. And soon... they'll be hiring another new grad, and you can compare yourself to that, if you feel the need to do so. :)
This isn't beyond you. If it were, you'd be getting counseled to think about something else and nobody would want to have lunch with you. :)
So. Tell me again what your expectations were? Or do you just feel a teeny bit better now you've gotten it off your chest and heard from some of us who have been there, done that, and feel you can get past this hump?
I can't fault your insight here. You're pretty spot on :)
Improvement in my job performance is definitely noticeable. My manager stated that he had heard good things about me and that I was improving when we had a sit down for my semi annual review. And I can feel improvement too.
I guess I not only hold myself to high standards but I also look at other new grads and feel like they appear more in control during a shift than I. Maybe I'm also just really impatient with myself.
Nursing is my second degree and it is easily one of the most demanding jobs I've ever done. I feel kind if disappointed that after all this time at school I can't say immediately that I love it, but I think a lot may be suffering through the 'new guy' syndrome and balancing my expectations with reality.
And, yeah, I do feel a bit better after venting :)
Sounds like you have a very supportive enviornment. If you leave now it may be very difficult to get another job, and the next place may not be very supportive, unless you find a new position while still employed. I hope you find what you are looking for. I hope we all do. :).
j_tay1981
219 Posts
I can't fault your insight here. You're pretty spot on :)
Improvement in my job performance is definitely noticeable. My manager stated that he had heard good things about me and that I was improving when we had a sit down for my semi annual review. And I can feel improvement too.
I guess I not only hold myself to high standards but I also look at other new grads and feel like they appear more in control during a shift than I. Maybe I'm also just really impatient with myself.
Nursing is my second degree and it is easily one of the most demanding jobs I've ever done. I feel kind if disappointed that after all this time at school I can't say immediately that I love it, but I think a lot may be suffering through the 'new guy' syndrome and balancing my expectations with reality.
And, yeah, I do feel a bit better after venting :)
Thanks!