I am wondering if any nurse that works in the NICU has or has had these feelings I have about the premature babies that need to be cared for. I am a mother myself of a 12 week early baby-who is now 5 years old and healthy, and I honestly feel that God presented me with the passion to want to work with these babies. Tonight I watched one of the "Hopkins" episodes and a baby born 10 weeks early was unable to sustain life on his own and passed away. My heart is just so deeply involved with these babies, and when it comes to these precious lives I feel attached-emotionally. I am currently a LPN and will have my RN next year (currently in school). The reason I even got into nursing was because of my premature son. Again, I felt as if it were a "calling" per say. I just need some reassurance, I see these precious delicate lives that are unable to stay with us here on earth, which is about the time I need to remember and convince myself that they will go to a better place (which I'm sure is when a strong understanding relationship with God really is needed). Does it get better? Do these emotions subside? I wouldn't have even gotten into nursing if it weren't for those babies (and my own son, with his circumstance), but I want to hear from you nurses that are familiar with what I am saying, and understand what I am trying to put into words-yet having difficulty doing so. Please relieve me in some way, reassure me, give me your input, your advice, thank you, it will mean the world to me. I should also mention that babies are what I want to work with/around. My heart knows I want to be around babies/neonates-even these premature/sick babies-my passion is very strong. But then I see things like what I saw tonight and it kills me.
That is a hard question. I've been a NICU nurse for over 20 years. Sometimes it is easy to let them go, sometimes it isn't. But, only you will know if you have the strength to do it. Sometime you will have to care for a baby that should have gone a long time ago, but because of doctor or parent decision is still here, those are the hardest ones to take care of. You will also take care of babies that die because their mom is foolhardy...has taken a huge meth or coke dose and abrupts her placenta and has the kid in the toilet, then said baby is brought to you and this mother insists that everything be done...even when you know it is futile and that poor baby should be allowed to die with dignity. Or the 22 week kids that get brought over and the parents just don't understand why he looks the way he does and yes I want a full code. We get kids that are there for months and months and they die from bad lungs, bad livers, bad guts. To me, those are the hardest ones next to the full term babies that die.
So, you see, it isn't only the dying babies you have to consider. Sometimes death is a better alternative to living, and as a NICU nurse you have to deal with that.
That is the problem with watching a "reality" show, they only show you a teeny portion of what really goes on, and they don't tell the whole story.
I wish you the best of luck in what you decide. Shadowing is good, but most likely you won't be exposed to anything bad or dramatic. Good luck!
I've only been a nurse for a year but this is what I have learned: Some patients no matter what you do will tug at your heart strings. No nurse is there to see his or her patient die, and every nurse will see patients die. You have to focus on the ones you do help and keep them in mind.
When I get overwhelmed with the tragedies I remind myself of the success stories and the stories of great hope. I'm there for them, as well to provide comfort to my little ones who are leaving. In my opinion working with babies and children is most challenging and therefore most rewarding.
Specializes in NICU, Mother-baby, home health care.
BabyNurse
Yes, I do feel that God has called me to be a nurse, and a NICU nurse at that. I enjoy all aspects of nursing, whether it be adults or infants, but my ultimate passion is with the babies in NICU. I live in Germany, so I just saw the Hopkins episode last night. And let me tell you, I was crying too. Watching the whole episode made me realize even more however very much I miss the NICU and working, period. I really hope to be able to get back to work soon, if something opens up. LOL Hang in there, I started working in the NICU ( a level IV) just 6 months out of nursing school. (I started in L&D) However the NICU had a wonderful mentor/education program. I was with a preceptor for nearly 3 months, working days and nights. I had class time and clinical time..but it was all part of my 7 to 7 shift. I felt prepared when I was finally on my own. But if you're in a good unit, the nurses that you're surrounded with, will be by your side and support you and help you. That's the great thing about working in the NICU, everyone is generally in the same room, or in hearing distance of eachother. Aw..I miss it.
I am a nicu nurse that is the mom to two preemies (now 10 and 8) both of my kids were very sick (26 wks IUGR and 27 wks). I have to say from the prospective of a mom that works in the NICU you need to make sure that you have detached from your own NICU experience. The memories that you have of your child are your own, but you can not take that into the NICU where you work. What I mean is that you cant look at all of the babies and think of your experience. Also, I dont recommend working at the NICU that your son was at. I think that you would be too attached to that enviornmnet. I went to nursing school after my kids were healthy because like you I felt that it was my calling. However, even though I know what the parents are going through I only tell a few of them my story. It is the job of the nurse to care for the patient as well as the family. It is very hard when I see a baby pass or get really sick, but I think I would feel that way even if my kids werent preemies. You will be able to empathize with the families butter than anyone, however this too can have its downsides. I love the NICU more than anything, and will never do any other aspect of nursing, but it took me along time to get here. I dont look at the babies now and think of my own, but for years when I watched tv shows or heard stories I would. Only you know what is right for you...good luck in your decision!!!
BittyBabyGrower, MSN, RN
1,823 Posts
That is a hard question. I've been a NICU nurse for over 20 years. Sometimes it is easy to let them go, sometimes it isn't. But, only you will know if you have the strength to do it. Sometime you will have to care for a baby that should have gone a long time ago, but because of doctor or parent decision is still here, those are the hardest ones to take care of. You will also take care of babies that die because their mom is foolhardy...has taken a huge meth or coke dose and abrupts her placenta and has the kid in the toilet, then said baby is brought to you and this mother insists that everything be done...even when you know it is futile and that poor baby should be allowed to die with dignity. Or the 22 week kids that get brought over and the parents just don't understand why he looks the way he does and yes I want a full code. We get kids that are there for months and months and they die from bad lungs, bad livers, bad guts. To me, those are the hardest ones next to the full term babies that die.
So, you see, it isn't only the dying babies you have to consider. Sometimes death is a better alternative to living, and as a NICU nurse you have to deal with that.
That is the problem with watching a "reality" show, they only show you a teeny portion of what really goes on, and they don't tell the whole story.
I wish you the best of luck in what you decide. Shadowing is good, but most likely you won't be exposed to anything bad or dramatic. Good luck!