New to PNAP and trying to connect with others! :)

Published Feb 15, 2016

5 Posts

Good afternoon everyone!

I am 27 years old, a LPN in PA, and I just started the VRP via PNAP this year. I take full responsibility for my past mistakes and so I'm not going to write a huge anti-PNAP post about how unfair the program is. It is what it is. I "volunteered" and am using this as an opportunity to clear my name. I have a DUI conviction from 3 years ago and am currently going through some legal troubles again. I was first contacted in January of 2015 and knowing everything I know now I should have just started then (lol) because I'd have the first year done with, but you live and you learn.

I never saw myself as an alcoholic because I wasn't an everyday drinker. I wasn't withdrawing. I just "like to have a good time." I am a "party girl." My "good time" started creating legal issues for me and that's when I realized that I might have a problem. Having a substance use disorder doesn't necessarily mean what people think when they picture what an alcoholic might look like. I don't drink all the time, but when I do I get into trouble and it's enough trouble to make me want to make a lifestyle change. I've never been a drug user (prescription/illegal) and currently the only meds I'm prescribed are birth control and Retin-A for my acne (lol). Other than that I take a daily vitamin. I honestly hate taking any kind of medicine in general and I'm pretty healthy over all, so I'm hoping that will make the next 3 years easier for me. Anyway that's a little bit of background information regarding how I got to this point.

I am currently on a medical leave of absence from work to complete the first 90 days of the program. At first I was upset that they said I could not work but now that I have SO MANY APPOINTMENTS to keep up with I don't know if I'd be able to keep up with everything working my normal full-time hours. I am also grateful my job didn't fire me, especially since I've read about how difficult it can be to find a job while being monitored. As long as I abide by the conditions of the VRP I get to keep my job! ! I am thankful for the help and support from my boyfriend during such a stressful time as well. Between my savings and a student loan I took out to assist with my living expenses, I'm hoping to survive financially until I am granted permission to return to work. So far "doing the right thing" is working out in my favor.

I look forward to meeting others and hearing your stories and experiences. If you are new and freaking out like I was at first, feel free to contact me to connect. At first I was angry and felt like I was being punished, but now I see that my own actions got me into this mess and I'm grateful for this opportunity to put my mistakes in the past and have a chance to document my sobriety.

Good luck everyone!