Ruby Vee, BSN 67 Articles; 14,023 Posts Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching. Has 40 years experience. Aug 2, 2010 there is one nurse, however, who has no patience and gets mad at me. friday night we were scheduled to work together. there was no monitor clerk scheduled to watch the telemetry monitors, so the other nurse assigned herself to that job and gave me the two patients we had on the unit. things were going ok. she talked to me about being nervous and told me to just take some deep breaths, that i'm doing well with my patient care. one of my patients who was on a vent, kept moving his legs so they would hang off the bed. i was charting. she noticed his legs off the bed and went in to put them back on the bed. then the other patient began to have audible congestion so the nurse helped suction her (oral and nasal). she wasn't bringing up a lot of secretions, so the nurse suggested i call the doctor to get some lasix ordered. i did. i gave the patient the lasix, and it was helping.then all of a sudden, and i'm not sure what set her off, the nurse got mad and made a comment that "you have to get over your nervousness, especially at someone else's expense". i don't think she was referring to my patients expense, because they were fine. i was not neglecting them.i got very upset over this. i hate to be this way, but i am very emotional. i tried to hide my emotions from her, but eventually i apologized for getting her upset. i said i cannot work like this and i had to talk about it (with tears in my eyes). she said she had a bad day and apologized for her actions. i am doubting my ability as a nurse now. she said "lets start over" and we had some zucchini bread and coffee. we talked later and i said to her that i may not be cut out for nursing. or maybe i should get out of icu and go work on the med/surg floor. she told me i will be a good nurse, i just need experience and have to get over being nervous. she made a comment for me not to go to talk to the nurse manager. she said it would be worse for me on the med/surg floor. she said i'll learn a lot in icu. our icu is small and we don't have really super critical patients. the critical ones are shipped out to bigger hospitals.i am seriously thinking about looking for another job. i had a couple of issues on other days when i worked with this nurse. i did talk to the supervisor who was on the first time i had an issue with her, and she told me to take deep breaths and do my best. the other nurse gets overwhelmed sometimes, but has not complained to management about me.i know i will get over the nervousness sometime, but in the meantime i'm stressing. i don't want to take any medication either. i am trying to have a positive attitude, but lately i can't seem to handle stress.i'm seriously thinking about getting out of nursing. please let me know if anyone has had similar experiences and how you coped with them.thanks.it seems that based on negative interactions -- one or a few -- with one nurse you're thinking you're not cut out to be an icu nurse. well maybe you are and maybe you aren't, but you haven't really given it enough time to know for sure. i don't understand what it is that this other nurse did to you that was so terrible? praise your work? tell you you would learn a lot in the icu? tell you you needed to get over your nervousness? the other nurse may not be overly blessed with patience -- many of us are not. but where did you get the idea that you were only going to encounter perfect people once you got into nursing? some people are impatient, poor teachers, poor learners, poor charge nurses, poor nurses, or poor colleagues. that has nothing to do with you. pay attention to what's in front of you. if someone gives you negative feedback, figure out -- or ask-- what you should have done differently. and then go back to work and apply what you've learned. that other nurse told you something that you seem to have overlooked. it's not just about you. you have patients to consider, too. "not neglecting them" is not the same thing as doing a good job of taking care of them. no doubt there is something you could have done better . . . . learn from it and resolve to do better next time. honestly? i think you're going to be a kick-@ss icu nurse. you are exactly the kind of nurse i would want to have if i were in the icu. you're the kind of nurse who isn't going to overlook something major because of the trepidation you have. now, that same trepidation is biting you in the butt because it's so stressful. but quitting and doing something different right now is not the answer. i have learned from first-hand experience that doing that will only make things worse, no matter what you end up doing. i was having very similar issues (and you remind myself of me, very much) and i bailed. huge mistake. actually, i was having very similar issues while orienting on days (i was hired for nights). it actually started to get easier but mostly i felt like an incompetent loser. i am not used to feeling that way so it was very hard on me. i truly needed to get around my ego (not that you are egotistical and i wasn't either, but i do think the ego gets in the way) and just press on, hard and steady. there will be good days and bad days. unfortunately, just a few days after changing over to nights i crashed and burned really bad. i wasn't sleeping at all, and i was still very stressed out and feeling incompetent and it was too much for me. i still regret bailing though - and i always will.now about that nurse. she sounds like a b*tthead. she sounds a little unpredictable and not a good source of support. i'm really happy to hear most of the other nurses are supportive and kind. that's huge.you could always talk to your supervisor and request that she not schedule you with that nurse because of "personality conflicts". you sound like a very easy-going, rational person. you do not sound like a trouble-maker. i think it would be totally reasonable to make that request.i hope you stick with it. i really, really believe you are and will be a great nurse.i still don't understand what that other nurse did that makes her a butthead. i'm sorry that you bailed on your job and even sorrier that you regret it, but requesting not to work with a certain nurse because of "personality conflicts" isn't going to help at all. it's just going to make you difficult for the supervisor. more than likely, she's going to side with the nurse she's worked with for a long time over the newbie. and you might just talk yourself out of a job, a learning experience, or a colleague who will be a great mentor if you can overlook her impatience or whatever other personality flaws i'm missing. i'm not sure where you two have gotten the idea that you should only have to work with people you like, or who like you, or are nice to you. there are as many personalities as there are people in the work place. if you want to learn and grow, to advance or even to remain employed, you're going to have to learn to work with them without running to the supervisor every time you feel as if you've been "picked on." figure out what the other nurse is trying to tell you, and focus on the message, not the delivery. it could be she can teach you a lot. even if not, you're still going to have to work with her. suck it up and deal.as for who is going to be a stellar icu nurse and who isn't -- i don't think we can tell from posts on the internet. perbd may or may not turn out to be an excellent nurse. i hope she does.