I hope I don't step on any toes here because I am not a nurse yet. I had the option of starting an RN or LPN program. I chose to try to do the LPN because that is all I think I can handle at this time. I take my DET exam next week.
I chose to post here because this seemed like the place that I would find someone who understands what I am going through.
I have been ill since 1996. Mis dx'd with several diseases such as Lupus, mixed connective tissue disease and MS. After all of those years I was dx'd with neurological Lyme disease. All treatments with steroids/solu medrol stopped and I was put on abx for 2 years. I had several months with a PICC line followed by oral abx.
I have been off all meds except my Cymbalta. The past two months I have been left pretty much symptom free except for lingering knee pain and daily headaches. The headaches I have been told are going to be staying because of the damage that Lyme did. I am starting a daily med next week to help combat them.
My problem is that I cam scared to death to finally start school. I have been on disability for the last 2 years. I was approved right away. They have a program called ticket to work which allows me to test the waters and see how I do in school/work before my benefits are taken away. I have been waiting to go to school for this since I was 21. I am now 33.
I guess I am afraid to take the plunge and be a normal non sick person. I keep thinking what ifs....what if this comes back..what if this happens.
I am trying to stay positive and I believe trying the LPN program first is a good choice for me..but like I said I am scared of all the possibilities.
Anyone else ever feel this way? I guess I just need some encouragement from others who have had to deal with disabilities.
I am also afraid that the school I am applying to will deny me if they found out I am just coming off of disability.
I am 44 yrs old and have Chiari malformation. I am trying to get into the fll 2009 nursing class. I figure that if I don't try I fail, if I try and find out I am not physical able to do the job atleast I will know I have done my best at trying.
Thankyou..and I understand how you feel. I can't just sit her in idle wondering if I am going to be well enough.
I dediced awhile back not to go for my RN just yet. I applied for LPN instead. I figured I should test the waters before I dive in. I know I love working in the health field so I know I will be happy being an LPN.
I took my entreance exam, had my interview and just received my acceptance letter yesterday. I will be starting this August 27. Yay....I am proud for making in this far.
The only down side is I am having a relapse of my lyme symptoms. Apparently I wasn't cured afterall. I will push forward though. I start back on some low dose doxycylcine tommorow. I think I could muddle through the pain of it but the constant fatigue is a barrier. Hopefully this will be nipped in the bud before my start date.
Thank you all so much for your encouragment. It really means alot.:redpinkhe
I know this is on old post but I thought I would pull it out of the cobwebs.
I can't believe I posted this over a year ago. I am very happy and PROUD to say that I will graduate soon..only about 40 days of school left.
I wanted to pull this back up for any other potential nursing students who have doubts because of disabilities. I was scared to start because of my fear of failing due to my health issues. It has been challenging because I have had some relapses and additional problems come up but I was able to push through it. I finished last semester with a 4.0 and an above average for clinical skills.
I am now looking forward to continuing my education with part time classes toward my RN.
If anyone is afraid that they will fail because of a disability you need to go for it. I would have truly been disappointed if I have never tried.
Congrats for getting through your first round of schooling.!!!!!!:yeah::yeah:
I became an RN in 1982. I was gung-ho!!!!! and ready to climb mountains. By 1995 I felt like a mountain had fallen on me. I was declared disabled in 1998. I was quite ill, with Fibromyalgia, CFIDS, you name it, I got it. In 2001 I went to the ER with a temp of 104, knowing that if someone didn't do something for me I was going to die. Luckily for me, one of my private docs was in the Er and I claimed him. He saved my life by doing a huge amount of testing and finally opening up my belly. I was full of MRSA e coli, of course.... Ten months later, one more round of surgery, this time, a sub total colectomy. After those two surgeries, I started to really get better. I prayed that someone would hire me after being off for 5 years on disability. I spent around six months being turned down, and then came THE job I wanted so much; back in the OR, again and finally!
The first year was awful; I was exhausted all the time, had to learn about five years of changes on the fly, etc. I got better and better, stronger and stronger, lost weight, took the dog for long walks and was fortunate enough to buy a house.
Were there periods of doubt? Oh yes, even suicidal ideation bouts, anxiety if I could really and truly come back full fledged. I did it. It was tough but worth it.
I was really making a good job out of it and so happy and delighted.
A patient fell on me in 2006 and three years later I find myself still in the same pain that I was in that day. I'm out of shape, have put on weight, have had the whole depressive thing all over again, and wonder if I can find a job that I can do. It's pretty obvious that I have to leave my beloved OR- and indeed, most of nursing, unless but some chance I can actually get exactly the right treatment to straighten out my back....
I'm looking for other jobs, hoping that I can stay in my hospital system, because I really like it here.
And just like you, I'm faced with the old message---If you don't try, you'll never know. If you don't know, you'll doubt yourself forever. I imagine that I'll have to go back to school, take some kind of certificate exam and the whole nine yards, but I just have to do better than I am now!
Thanks for sharing your fears and triumphs. I appreciate reading what you had to say and all the encouragement you got along the way.
We may be physically broken in one way or another, but at the same time, I think that people who have chronic challenges work so hard to make it look normal......we are tough folks.
Sandy_dfw
192 Posts
I am 44 yrs old and have Chiari malformation. I am trying to get into the fll 2009 nursing class. I figure that if I don't try I fail, if I try and find out I am not physical able to do the job atleast I will know I have done my best at trying.
I say go for it and I wish you the best of luck.