Need help. 12th day on the floor, feeling bullied....

[triageyoda]

I really need some advice if anyone can help me figure this out. I interviewed for a position at a local hospital coming from a doctors office. The position I was hired for was a step above what I applied for, but I eagerly agreed to take it on because the departments are very similar. Today was my 12th day on the floor (8 hour days) I am supposed to be on Orientation for 6 weeks. All of the women are very experienced and very fast and my preceptor changes every few days. I have noticed 2 women in particular that have serious attitudes about my skill level. Eyeball rolling, huffing and puffing, pulling things out of my hand, everything I do is wrong.. right down to the number of seconds I apply skin prep, where I place items in the patients room, etc. Yesterday one of the ladies very blatantly asked for a private meeting with my boss right in front of me in order to air her grievances about my performance. She then proceeded to send an email up the chain of command telling this manager what she didn't like about my work. I watch theses ladies whisper to each other about me as if I weren't standing 10 feet away. They correct me in front of patients. I got tired of the games today and I finally asked my supervisor if there was something I needed to know because I'm not stupid, and she proceeds to tell me that I am moving way too slow, that I am not meeting anyone's expectations, that I am way behind compared to where most people are at this point in Orientation, that I should be operating far more independently by now, etc. Ok. I feel so intimidated by these aggressive personalities that it is hard for me to concentrate. How am I supposed to know that I'm behind pace if people are running to supervisors and directors and not me? No one told me at day 3, 5, or 7 that the pace was that bad. Now all of a sudden I am 2 weeks behind where I'm supposed to be? Now I really feel stupid! Also when my supervisor receives this feedback shouldn't she come to me and tell me right away to help me make these corrections instead of just sitting on this info and dropping a huge bomb on me only after I pull it out of her because I know what BS smells like?

Again, this is my 12th day on the floor. These ladies have been doing this job 9-45 years. They knew I was coming from a doctors office. I don't understand how I can be running independently at this point if I feel so intimidated that I have lost all of my confidence and can't even sleep at night. My supervisor also proceeded to tell me today that her experience tells her that if I am this far behind I can't catch up and am probably not a good fit for the position.... I am so confused. I thought I had 6 weeks to learn and grow. Can somebody please explain to me what I should be reading between the lines? My interpretation is that they have already decided they are getting rid of me and I am beside myself. I just can't believe this is happening after only 12 days on the floor. Up until this weekend I thought I was working towards a goal at the end of the 6 weeks and now they tell me I suck??? I work so hard and try so hard I'm really confused and hurt. Pretty sure my "meeting" this Friday will be the boot. Anyone have any ideas on how to salvage this? I don't even know where to start as far as communication is concerned. I feel like only my skills can speak for themselves at this point but somehow I have to be able to lock out the intimidation that is going on or I won't get my confidence back.

Help! near tears and don't know what to do!

[jadelpn, LPN, EMT-B]

Go to the meeting with confidence. State that you were hired for the position with them knowing full well your past experience. That you would prefer goal oriented benchmarks that you should be hitting per week. That you are "not where you should be" is subjective, and if you are unclear on "where you should be" is, then you need to ask what more needs accomplishing to be caught up to date on orientation.

It could be that they will let you go at no real expense to them at near the end of your orientation. This happens often, and usually a delay tactic-- to have a body until another nurse is available who is experienced and can't get to the unit until other obligations are done. There's lots of reasons.

You need to be sure that this is the type of nursing that you want to do. You could ask to be transferred to another internal job opportunity. You could polish off your resume and look at other opportunities that you might enjoy.

I certainly would not hesitate to make my feelings known if this is a termination and a bashing session all in one. Do not allow them to strip you of your confidence, as seemingly they have done that already. Because you are "not a good fit" for the unit does not mean you are not a good nurse. Maybe a transition from a PCP office is to think about urgent care. Then to an ER.

All in all this is an enviroment that is not productive to you and your orientation.

[Altra, BSN, RN]

I'm sorry that you are in this situation. Let me add some perspective.

If your shifts are all 8 hours and you have 6 weeks of orientation, that is 30 shifts. If you have completed 12, you are nearly at the halfway point. While I obviously cannot comment on your personal performance, I don't think it is unreasonable for an experienced manager to make the judgement call that at some point, a poor employee-job fit becomes apparent. An experienced preceptor and/or manager can certainly cite performance weaknesses that do tend to improve with a little extra time, vs. those that more likely indicate a mismatch between an individual and the skills/strengths needed for a particular job.

Make the most of your upcoming meeting. Ask specific questions about skills which need improvement and other benchmarks. Listen nonemotionally to the feedback you are given. At this point you should be a sponge and take in any and all advice offered to you, including things that may seem particularly persnickety like where to place things in a patient's room for maximum efficiency. Later on will be the time you will find your own groove and sort through all that has been taught to you to pick & choose what really works for you.

Lastly, it is not the end of the world if this particular job proves to be not right for you. If you have had success in a previous job, think about why. What is it that made you successful there? What is different about this job? Why did you choose this job? What motivates you to stay in this new environment vs. the former one? These will be important points to sort out.

Good luck to you.