Nasty situation - need advice

fotografe · Aug 31, 2005

You have to remember that the decision to give her the job was not hers, it was the management. I say never burn any bridges -- while you may have not gotten this position, for any number of reasons, your name may have been tossed out there to get a charge position on another unit. Obviously you were doing a great job.

Go in, do your job, be professional, and wait out the next opportunity. Good luck!

Well, I haven't been visiting here in a long while, but I sure could use some advice right about now. For the last year or so I have been acting as charge nurse on the unit where I work. Last month the manager asked if we should make it a permanent situation. I agreed because I often had problems with authority and communication because of my casual status. She then said she would have to post it in order to follow policy. Well, a nurse applied who, when I asked her previously throughout the year to take charge so I could have a break, always said "No, me and charge don't get along" (that was one of my problems, no one else would do it). Guess what - she got the job (this was after she was moved to our unit without posting the position she was given). Now, I know that she has been friends with the manager for a long time, and her brother is a physician at the hospital, but to say the least I have been devastated by the decision.
Now, a big part of me says it's my own fault for being so stupid. The advice I am looking for is that I have to work this weekend with this person (I did put in a bunch of transfer requests the day after I heard about the decision). This will be the first day I have to work with her. Do I want to get there early, so I am first on the unit? How do I approach her? How do I keep my cool? She has always acted friendly, and our weekend crowd was, I thought, a good team. I dread going in on Saturday. Help!!

Repat · Aug 31, 2005

You have to remember that the decision to give her the job was not hers, it was the management. I say never burn any bridges -- while you may have not gotten this position, for any number of reasons, your name may have been tossed out there to get a charge position on another unit. Obviously you were doing a great job.
Go in, do your job, be professional, and wait out the next opportunity. Good luck!

You are right, she did not make the decision to hire her - that is why I am leaving the department! Because I can no longer work for that manager. However, this person made the decision to apply for the job (a job that she refused to do when there wasn't any recognition). That's why I will have a very hard time working with her.

llg, PhD, RN · Aug 31, 2005

I think there is little question here about how you should act. You should be friendly and professional. Congratulate her on her new position. Put a smile on your face even if you don't feel happy about it.

This is one of those difficult times in life that we all go through now and again. It can be very hard to behave with grace and dignity when you are angry, but it will get you farther in the long run. You've made your decision to leave. There is no need to make enemies or leave people with a negative impression of you as you go.

If you show them your best behavior ... they'll be sorry they lost you.

If you show them anything less than your best ... they will think they made the right decision in not choosing you for the position and not be sorry to see you go.

Good luck.

llg

hrtprncss · Aug 31, 2005

we can't always work with the best charge rn's all the time. we can't always be charge all the time. i rotate as one of the three permanent charge rn's on days in my unit, we do 3/12. and some feel uncomfortable working under someone when it's not their turn to be charge. personally, the best move to keep a charge nurse off ur back is to be on top of things when it comes to your patients, therefore they won't have to bother you.

Spearfisher · Aug 31, 2005

I agree whole heartedly with llg. Also, that the next time you are given a position of authority, act with authority and good communication skills even if it is just temporary/casual position.

barefootlady, ADN, RN · Sep 1, 2005

I completely understand how you feel. That being said, I agree with everyone who advised you to act professional, smile (even if it hurts), do your assignment and leave the charge part up to the new charge nurse. Stay busy, do not be around the desk area more than necessary. Why would you report to the floor early? Usually the charge nurse does that. I know you feel suckered by this nurse and the manager, look at this as a learning experience. Good luck and let us know how the shift went.

Repat · Sep 4, 2005

I completely understand how you feel. That being said, I agree with everyone who advised you to act professional, smile (even if it hurts), do your assignment and leave the charge part up to the new charge nurse. Stay busy, do not be around the desk area more than necessary. Why would you report to the floor early? Usually the charge nurse does that. I know you feel suckered by this nurse and the manager, look at this as a learning experience. Good luck and let us know how the shift went.

OK, everyone, worked my first shift with her. Did my work, helped when asked, kept my nose out of everything else. It was very difficult, but I have decided that I am now in the perfect mind set to go agency - show up, do my job, leave. So, I will be calling agencies next week.