Most stressful moment as a nurse?

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Excluding anything that led to a lawsuit or information that would be inappropriate to share with the message board, what is the most stressful situation you ever experienced as a nurse?

I had a patient whose religion did not permit a certain procedure which would have improved her health significantly at the time (although ultimately not cure her). I knew of her religion and, while I did not personally agree with it, I respected her views and NEVER ONCE approached her about this procedure and/or the benefits of it. However, one night she was obviously struggling, very short of breath, and I was concerned about her possibly coding. (I had discussed this with other nurses who were also concerned, so it wasn't me overreacting.)

On this night, I began a conversation with her about end of life issues and decisions. There was an elder from her church present, and she completely misinterpreted what I was talking with the patient about. She began to be very aggressive with me verbally and went on and on about how I shouldn't push my views on my patients and such. I eventually told her that I didn't think we should continue the conversation (after a good while that I allowed her to lecture me), so I called the nursing supervisor, who came and was, herself, lectured for a good long time. I was very distressed about this, because I treat all of my patients with the same care and respect, without regard to their religious beliefs.

Nothing ever came of it, but the supervisor wrote my NM explaining that I had done nothing wrong... I was simply attempting to allow my patient to make an informed decision about her healthcare.

I definitely learned not to do that again! Now, I let the doctors do that for the most part.

BTW mike, you didn't share yours!?

Actually I do this but not in the presence of clergy. This decision is much more private than even clergy would allow. I might make one decision in front of my clergy and a different on if I thought the only person there were impartial. The very presence of clergy prevents patients from speaking freely and expressing wishes contrary to what clergy would.

Clergy are not impartial and even when they are (God bless the few who can be) patients naturally assume otherwise and respond accordingly.

I would not ask a pt about their bms in front of clergy or other visitors.

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The patient's bizarre behavior was caused by a well-meaning doc abruptly DC'ing all of his psych meds. The on-call mistakenly thought someone else was on call that night, and eventually the facility medical director was called and the patient was shipped out to the ER. But those hours before the patient was taken out were a few of the most awful of my life. I could never be a psych nurse.

In psyc they don't abruptly stop all psyc meds.

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Specializes in M/S, Onc, PCU, ER, ICU, Nsg Sup., Neuro.

My ordeal to my current stressful moment as a nurse continues on. I am now with faced continuing on agressively with a trach/PEG and long term vent(nsg home for weeks to months and possibly the rest of her life-per her neuro intensivist) for my wife which I know is not what she wants versus removal of life support and letting nature take it's course. In my 22 years as a nurse I have dealt this too many times from the non-attached professional standpoint, so this is extremely difficult for me. We lived in Florida during the Terri Schiavo incident and had discussed what we wanted and didn't want, just never put it into writing due to our cross country move and difficult adaption to a state we don't like(also when you are early 50's it wasn't quite a rush to do kinda of thing). Her older sister is in agreement with me but I also want input from her children as well so that everyone understands and is aware of what's going on and where we may need to go with this. I wish tyo thank everyone who has responded with much needed kind words of support. I am holding on at present thanks to my family,friends and support from folks such as yourselves.

Flaerman:o

See support thread for Flaerman: https://allnurses.com/forums/f8/most-stressful-moment-nurse-spouse-vent-decision-making-276023.html

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The one I'm going through right now. After 18 years as a nurse, being sued, learning about the meat grinder that is the legal process of malpractice. I'm unsure that anyone survives, except maybe the lawyers taking their 30% off the top. Realizing that there is a code of silence, encouraged by the lawyers and risk management but even more devastating. Talk about being back in my childhood: Don't Talk, Don't feel, Don't heal. I worked too hard to heal myself to feel like I'm back at step one.

I'm looking for a support group specific to healthcare providers who have been faced with this hell. One of the treatments for PTSD (of course, I have it!) is finding a support group of people facing similar trauma. Anyone know of any? Serious request!

That I adore my patients and their families and that I can't think of anything else I want to do are the only things keeping me in nursing right now.

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