Ok, I have worked 40 hours in the last 4 days, one of which was a double on a medicare, subacute unit in LTC. I love my job, and until yesterday thought I was good at it, but I am again questioning my ever having become a nurse.
Lastnight at work, a co-worker severed most of her finger in a linen closet door, and what do I do? PANIC.
not the full out, but close enough. I wrapped her finger, which was still somewhat attached in a 4x4 gauze yell for another nurse to apply pressure while I call 911, weekend manager, and try to figure out how to call family.
Trust me this sounds like I held it together much better than I really did. I have this uncanny ability to have my voice quivering at very inappropriate and inconvienient times, like while talking to 911. I am in geriaterics for crying out loud, not trauma. But I should have handeled it better, what kind of nurse freaks?
Some one please tell me they have had an oh, **** moment and completely lost it and still managed to continue nursing. At this point I am researching EMT training, only to discover the things they cover, I have already done in school... So wish I could hit rewind and do it over, but better. Hindsight huh?
Thank you all for your replys. Fortunately a nurse I went to school with was working the other hall, and while I freaked, she so held it together. Applied pressure, kept her calm. Everything I should have done.
Its just a little staggering knowing I am nurse and freaked when I saw the tip of her finger and the first joint dangling just by the pad of her finger. Fortunately I have moments like this only once, and never a second time. You just assume that as a nurse you should be more composed and freak after its over, not durring. Thank God my co worker and I were in school together, we get the unique experience of learning together the hard way.
Its just helpful to know there are others out there who understand. Just a little humulliating going to work the next day and facing co-workers I had the melt down in front of. I talked to the co-worker this happened to on the phone yesterday and she's doing better, facing surgery wednesday to reattach the tendon and screw together the finger.
I truly want to find very realistic scenario classes to attend. Drill enough and it becomes second nature right? I think nurses need trauma classes on a regular basis, because you never know when you will face trauma and be the only one there. I never want to experience this again.
Again thank you all for being an ear to vent to. It was a rough weekend.
I agree, you freaked b/c it was a coworker/friend, it definitely makes a difference. When I was a new nurse a coworker came in for the noc shift and coded right in the report room, we did a full code, she died. We ALL freaked during and for quite a while after, it was awful. It is much different if you have an emotional investment in the person.
Your story trumps mine I can't imagine the nightmares that left you with. Not to mention losing the person. That would be so much worse, the hindsight of wondering what could have been done differently and for someone you know and worked with. I guess I can stop whining now.
My husband is constantly telling me I am harder on myself than I need to be, especially with moments like this. I just want to be the best at what I do. I mean not litterally the best, but give it my best. And when I have a moment like this and realize my best was a dismal failure (at least in my eyes) it frustrates me to no end. I guess I expect nursing perfection from myself. Too bad I'll never achieve it. I suppose I should just settle for calm and moderatly competent. :brnfrt:
I truly want to find very realistic scenario classes to attend. Drill enough and it becomes second nature right? I think nurses need trauma classes on a regular basis, because you never know when you will face trauma and be the only one there. I never want to experience this again.
It sounds like you want to be desensitized in the face of trauma. Although the coursework of an EMT-B has already been covered in nursing school, the experience of seeing trauma patients would be new to you.
In my last career, I had to go through 3 different academies and schools. In each one, the students were exposed to very graphic videos, pictures, and real experiences to desensitize us to what we would be encountering in the field. It does work. However, like I said before......
I have seen many things: a decapitation from a passing car (we had to locate all the brain matter for the investigation), traumatic asphyxiation from the man's body being torqued around the wheel of a truck, a shotgun blast to the face, etc.......the shakiest I ever felt was when my child fell. When it is personal, the adrenaline rushes and I don't think you can control that!
I can't imagine the nightmares that left you with. Not to mention losing the person. That would be so much worse, the hindsight of wondering what could have been done differently and for someone you know and worked with. I guess I can stop whining now.
crazdmomof4
74 Posts
Thank you all for your replys. Fortunately a nurse I went to school with was working the other hall, and while I freaked, she so held it together. Applied pressure, kept her calm. Everything I should have done.
Its just a little staggering knowing I am nurse and freaked when I saw the tip of her finger and the first joint dangling just by the pad of her finger. Fortunately I have moments like this only once, and never a second time. You just assume that as a nurse you should be more composed and freak after its over, not durring. Thank God my co worker and I were in school together, we get the unique experience of learning together the hard way.
Its just helpful to know there are others out there who understand. Just a little humulliating going to work the next day and facing co-workers I had the melt down in front of. I talked to the co-worker this happened to on the phone yesterday and she's doing better, facing surgery wednesday to reattach the tendon and screw together the finger.
I truly want to find very realistic scenario classes to attend. Drill enough and it becomes second nature right? I think nurses need trauma classes on a regular basis, because you never know when you will face trauma and be the only one there. I never want to experience this again.
Again thank you all for being an ear to vent to. It was a rough weekend.