Maybe I'm not cut out to be a nurse?

[WonderLinds]

I just got off shift and I've been yelled at again. And, as usual, the person who yelled at me was not a patient, but a coworker. I am frequently the target of bullying -- I've been told I'm too nice. Tonight I got yelled at by a surgeon for reading back a telephone order, and then I got yelled at during report at the end of my shift for relating that a patient with osteomyelitis who is set to be discharged in a few days is now popping up with a fever and a MEWS score of 3. Apparently she didn't think this was information worthy of her time. She's a known bully and I was warned about her more than once.

But the real issue is how I feel now. I just don't think I'll ever be the type of person to get yelled at like that and have it just "roll off my back." It's been 5 years since I passed my boards, and my skin ain't gettin' any thicker. Maybe I'm just not cut out to be a nurse? I've worked in rural hospitals where the need for nurses is high and an experienced nurse can act basically any way she chooses. How do you all deal with this issue of nurse/doctor bullying? Of being yelled at regularly and learning not to care. I get this sick feeling in my tum just thinking about it. I appreciate any coping advice you might have, or even just to know I'm not alone in this.

[ILUVERNSG, MSN, RN]

Great advice! OP: please consider doing some assertiveness training.

Sounds like your co-worker woke up on the wrong side of the bed. DEFINITELY let that go. Poof. Gone. She can bellyache into the atmosphere all she wants and it has nothing to do with you. Don't absorb it. Continue on with a business-like report. Everyone knows who people like this are - - they're only kidding themselves if they think they are making others (such as yourself) look bad with their protestations and grumbling. They are making themselves look foolish.

Physicians - when you call them, concisely tell them why you are calling, including any pertinent facts. Know ahead of time what outcome you might anticipate. Is there a particular med order you are expecting, or a change in care order? At the end of presenting your problem, you can say something like, "how would you like to handle this?" or "would you like to treat this?" They need to answer appropriately. I never huff and puff no matter what they do. I will not let them get a rise out of me. If a physician said something to me like "put whatever the hell you want", I chuckle and use my friendly voice and say, "If I were allowed to do that I wouldn't have called you! What order would you like?" OR this:

Me: "Let me repeat that back: You would like Lasix 40 (four zero) mg IV push to be given now?"

Doc - "Write whatever the hell you want!!!!"

Me: "Yes or no. Lasix 40 mg IV push to be given now."

***

Carry yourself with dignity. Work at a brisk pace, keep your chin up, make good eye-contact, smile and say hello to others as you pass in the hall. Start to develop a pleasant and humble self-confidence. Recognize the good that you do and let it be an encouragement.

Recognize that others' difficulties (and maladaptive behaviors) exist on a separate plane from your emotions.

That's about all I've got...