Management?

BerryhappyRN, MSN, RN · Jun 16, 2017

Dear Shortone7,

I am attempting to find a way to convey to you my opinion of leaving the hospice RNCM field and entering management without appearing bitter, angry, sad and regretful.

I'll start with a little history...

I started in hospice as a night shift Continuous Care LPN, 12 hour night shifts caring for people in their homes bedside. I LOVED it. After 3 years I earned my RN and had to leave my company for RN experience. Then after 2 years as an RN was finally permitted to return to hospice (only one company in my area). I returned to hospice as an RNCM and again LOVED IT. After 3 years in the field my manager resigned and I decided to apply as I thought it would be better to take the position then chance getting a poor manager. My favorite saying is no good deed goes unpunished, and this is a perfect example.

I have regretted taking the position since the day I started. Yes, there was a 25% pay increase, a nice title, a beautiful office but none of that is enough compensation for the 60 hour work weeks, the horror of middle management and most importantly the complete cessation of providing direct patient care. :-(

Literally, from day one I had body aches from going from walking and moving for 8 hours per day to sitting at a computer screen or in meetings 8 hours per day. I went through withdrawal from the spirituality that is felt from caring for a person at end-of-life to a connectedness to nothing. I have learned things about my company I wish I never knew, so I know I will not be able to return to the field and be employed in hospice (remember only one hospice in my town).

I know I am an excellent manager, my team members (former teammates) tell me every day how glad they are that they chose me. I know the company is pleased with my work, but I am miserable. I was just thinking yesterday how interesting it is that someone can be so good at something and still hate what they are doing. I desperately miss patient care. I abhor having all the responsibility for leading for my team, but no ability to create the policies that impact them.

Some people tell me I am in a poorly run company, some say this is simply middle management, some say this is just what nursing management is like. It doesn't matter why, I just want out. My health has declined, my neck and back ache from sitting all day (yes I do laps on the stairs every hour but I still hurt), I have more grey hair, and I think my family is more miserable than I am as they have to put up with my bad attitude when I get home every day. I am actively seeking work elsewhere and will be sad to leave my team but for my own self-preservation am forced to leave to save my mind and my body.

My only suggestion is that until you can no longer physically work as a RNCM, STAY an RNCM. I am working on my MSN in Nursing Leadership am learning how a good company should run. Unless you are secure that your company is well run, I do not support making the move.

That wasn't too bitter, angry, sad or regretful...was it??? :yes:

Nascar nurse, ASN, RN · Jun 16, 2017

Well, I was going to respond but Berryhappy did it for me! All I have to say it ditto to the above and JUST.DON'T.DO.IT!

Shortone7 · Jun 17, 2017

Well I asked for it and thank you to both of you for giving it! That is not really what I wanted to hear. Ours is a very large non profit company and our region is fairly small still. I know the manager leaving is leaving for those very reasons that you two just described! I am getting close to retirement though and I really do need more money. Ugh. Tough decision. Like both of you, I LOVE the rewards of being a case manager. !!!