Is nursing right for me?

[Milky7126]

I’m a new grad nurse working on my own for under 2 months at med surg/tele unit. This really isn’t a bad unit compared to what others go through. We’re usually fully staffed to have 5 patients. My coworkers are helpful. On top of that I’m night shift. 
 

Yet I am so so stressed out about work. I have improved with charting speed, protocols, and when I’m made aware of mistakes I really do try to learn from them. I definitely have improved but I don’t think I’m at the level where I’m supposed to be. And I also think I’m being hard on myself but it’s hard to not compare myself to the other new grads who leave shortly after shift change. 
 

I wouldn’t consider myself an anxious person but I have never cried so much. I dread going into work. I’m not used to night shift and already have trouble sleeping during the day but on top of that I have dreams about work and messing up at work. My tolerance for getting overwhelmed is getting smaller. 
 

I have a 4 year contract with this hospital and 1 year of commitment before transferring units. I really want to stick with this for at least 6 months but I feel like this job is leeching into my personal life way too much. 
 

I would appreciate advice. Or even words of encouragement. I feel like the biggest baby ever but I don’t know how else to get help without owning up to how I really feel. 

[caffeinatednurse, BSN, RN]

Every new grad nurse feels this way at one time or another. I felt this way for a very long time, as well. You start feel like you’re investing too much of yourself with little return for your efforts. You think that how you’re feeling is unique and everyone else is doing so much better than you.

You are and they’re not. They’re just handling things differently. It takes at least a year to feel more comfortable in your role as a nurse. You’re being asked to do things you’ve never done before and you’re being challenged constantly. The only way to get better at something is to keep trying. You’ll keep making mistakes and that’s OK, as long as it’s not the same mistake over and over again. Eventually, you’ll build a bank of knowledge and other people will come to you with their questions. But you’re not there yet, and you shouldn’t expect yourself to be. You’re going to feel wildly uncomfortable for a while before you find your style of nursing and figure out how to navigate your unit. The fact that you’re self-aware enough to recognize your own mistakes means that you’re still trying your hardest. Keep up the good work.

[Jeff Keeth, BSN, MSN, RN]

If I'm reading this correctly, the pt population is never above 5 which means you probably have 2 patients. So, no, I don't understand your problem.

[Milky7126]

On 10/4/2022 at 10:51 AM, caffeinatednurse said:

Every new grad nurse feels this way at one time or another. I felt this way for a very long time, as well. You start feel like you’re investing too much of yourself with little return for your efforts. You think that how you’re feeling is unique and everyone else is doing so much better than you.

You are and they’re not. They’re just handling things differently. It takes at least a year to feel more comfortable in your role as a nurse. You’re being asked to do things you’ve never done before and you’re being challenged constantly. The only way to get better at something is to keep trying. You’ll keep making mistakes and that’s OK, as long as it’s not the same mistake over and over again. Eventually, you’ll build a bank of knowledge and other people will come to you with their questions. But you’re not there yet, and you shouldn’t expect yourself to be. You’re going to feel wildly uncomfortable for a while before you find your style of nursing and figure out how to navigate your unit. The fact that you’re self-aware enough to recognize your own mistakes means that you’re still trying your hardest. Keep up the good work.

Thank you. I also forget I was a covid baby and got barely any clinicals. I forget how far I’ve come and how much I’ve learned on the job. I think it’s funny that when I first started I was so nervous about my first insulin administration, haha. I know I have so much to learn still but I also have my own mini accomplishments. 
I haven’t figured out my style of nursing & it can be frustrating to try a certain order & then have to change it but I know it’ll be worth it once I find my rumble. 
I appreciate your support. Rarely anyone outside the field seems to understand and I was having trouble separating work & personal life. I’m doing a lot better mentally & I figured out a sleep schedule that works for me. 
<3 much love to you

[Milky7126]

On 10/10/2022 at 6:32 PM, Jeff Keeth said:

If I'm reading this correctly, the pt population is never above 5 which means you probably have 2 patients. So, no, I don't understand your problem.

There is a misunderstanding, haha

[Ellepile]

I’ve been a nurse for 15 years now and I still feel the way you do sometimes.  This is a hard job with a steep learning curve, and it will get better and you will get better at it.  You. Just.  Started.  You won’t and can’t possibly be an expert right out of the gate.  And you shouldn’t feel bad about it because it is normal.  You’re doing fine.

[Rionoir, ADN, RN]

2 months is nothing, even for an experienced nurse switching to med surg for the first time. I have seen ICU nurses float to med surg and get taken down a few pegs by the end of their shift. 

Now can we talk about this FOUR YEAR CONTRACT?! Who the hell signs something like that? 

[Milky7126]

Rionoir said:

2 months is nothing, even for an experienced nurse switching to med surg for the first time. I have seen ICU nurses float to med surg and get taken down a few pegs by the end of their shift. 

Now can we talk about this FOUR YEAR CONTRACT?! Who the hell signs something like that? 

I ended up sticking through for over a year until my resignation that happened recently. I had my ups and downs. Yes, I definitely improved & things came to me more naturally but ultimately the stress ate at me. 
 

I signed the contract because they help cover for school and it's for a big name hospital that most new grads look at with stars in their eyes. I did too. I thought 4 years would be nothing there. 

[ns00100, BSN]

Nursing is such a broad area. If you feel unhappy with one... it's probably best if you try other areas of nursing. Your dedication and compassion will shine as you find your area of interest. Embrace the learning curve, trust your training, and remember that every experience is an opportunity for growth. You've got this!