Is A Vampire Draining Your Energy?

Got any Energy Vampires in your life? These are folks who suck the life out of you, spit you out and leave you in a pile of dust. Sounds pretty awful, doesn’t it? Let’s explore what is going on here.

Is A Vampire Draining Your Energy?

If you are like me, you have an overabundance of "helping, giving, nurturing, caring" - sometimes called co-dependency. The bad news is if you don't recognize it as an asset that can be managed, it could do you in. This state of being could also set you up for being too empathetic and consequently become what is called an EMPATH. You take on whatever energy is around you and you use it as your own. You often don't know where you end and another person begins.

And so the Energy Vampire, who is overly narcissistic enters the picture who eagerly feeds off the energy of others. And if you are an EMPATH it could be you! This can set you up for mega-stress of having to deal with constant disappointment, negativity, criticism, and trying to fix their behavior. And this over-abundance of stress hormones in your body can lead to dysregulation of your immune system, inflammation, susceptibility to infectious diseases, I could go on and on. Energy Vampires can make you sick!

Thus we need to recognize the traits of the EMPATH to see if we fit the profile, and then determine strategies to keep our lives in balance. Here are some traits of EMPATHS. Do any of these resonate with you?

10 Traits of an EMPATH from the book Emotional Freedom by Judith Orloff MD

  1. Empaths are highly sensitive - World-class nurturers.
  2. Empaths absorb other people's emotions - Feel everything, sometimes to an extreme.
  3. Many empaths are introverted - Prefer one to one contact or small groups.
  4. Empaths are highly intuitive - Experience the world through their intuition.
  5. Empaths need alone time - To recharge their batteries
  6. Empaths can become overwhelmed in intimate relationships - Afraid of being engulfed and losing their identity.
  7. Empaths are targets for energy vampires - Fear or rage from another can sap their energy and peace of mind.
  8. Empaths become replenished in nature - The natural world nourishes and restores them.
  9. Empaths have highly tuned senses - Nerves can get frayed by noise, smells, or excessive talking.
  10. Empaths have huge hearts but sometimes give too much - Try to relieve the pain of others.

So how did you do with this list? Got any of the traits, or a trait or two of being an EMPATH? If so, it might be helpful to address the situation and start taking action. Dr. Christiane Northrup OB-GYN, women's health pioneer, international speaker and best selling author of women's health books offers up some solutions taken from her latest online course, Dodging Energy Vampires Online Course.

7 Strategies For Protecting Yourself Against Energy Vampires

  1. Realize they exist. Empaths believe that everyone is good and often will stay in a toxic relationship too long while making excuses for an energy vampire.
  2. Keep a gut instincts journal. Keep track of how situations play out for your energy vampire in any of the situations you encounter
  3. Find a reality-check friend. Have a clearheaded and trustworthy person whom you can reach out to when you are feeling uncertain
  4. Put yourself first. When you encounter an energy vampire, take a step back (or out of the room or building) and remember that you were meant to live a joyful life and you don't have to put up with their behavior.
  5. Pat yourself on the back regularly. Congratulate yourself regularly for who you are and for what you do well.
  6. Say "no." Minimize your interactions with a vampire.
  7. Get support. Connect with a psychotherapist or group who specializes in narcissistic abuse recovery

The core of an EMPATH is always grounded in love, compassion and service, not self-sacrifice and martyrdom. When you love yourself first, you can shield yourself from energy vampires. Life is meant to be joyful and not surrounded by people who drain you emotionally. Keep your Energy Vampire radar operating whenever you encounter people so you can do a personal "gut check" and either engage or move on. It could save your health and your life!

Have you ever been in a relationship with an energy vampire? How have you protected yourself?

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Carol Ebert

About Carol Ebert, MSN, RN

Carol Ebert RN, BSN, MA, CHES, Certified Wellness Practitioner, Certified Mindful Coach, Sanoviv Nutrition Advisor

36 Articles   207 Posts

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Specializes in LTC, assisted living, med-surg, psych.

I am an empath who has a close relative that is an energy vampire. I love her dearly but it's become clear to me that it's much safer for me to love her from a distance. She keeps trying to drag me into her constant fighting with my youngest son (their relationship is complicated) and I simply change the subject when she brings it up in our infrequent conversations. I don't have the emotional capital to invest in this. It's bad for my mental health. It's taken me the better part of 60 years to figure out that I can walk away when things get too intense, but better late than never.

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Specializes in Wellness and Coaching for Women in their Third Act.
I am an empath who has a close relative that is an energy vampire. I love her dearly but it's become clear to me that it's much safer for me to love her from a distance. She keeps trying to drag me into her constant fighting with my youngest son (their relationship is complicated) and I simply change the subject when she brings it up in our infrequent conversations. I don't have the emotional capital to invest in this. It's bad for my mental health. It's taken me the better part of 60 years to figure out that I can walk away when things get too intense, but better late than never.

I agree better late than never. A freeing feeling knowing you are taking care of yourself and have the awareness when you aren't so you can recalibrate. I love that quote.

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