I'm not sure if nursing is for me (Excuse the lonnggg post)

[Hondagirl88]

Hello,

I'll start off by giving a little background information. I have been an RPN in Ontario for almost 1.5 years. I became a PSW in 2015. I started out working in retirement facility but obtained employment in LTC so ultimately resigned after 1 year for the LTC job. I decided to go back to school for the RPN course. I obtained employment from another LTC facility where I did my consolidation. It is probably one of the best facilities there is, and city owned= comparable to hospital wage. I held a Behavioural support position for 6 months, and also worked on the units, consisting of 32 patients and 3 PSWS. I really liked the BSO position but it was only temporary. It allowed me to really explore the Point Click Care system, help staff on the floor, and the residents. I did not apply to other postings as they were typically only a weekend for the whole pay period. I worked full time, on all 8 different units. Once I got over the initial new nurse fear, I still felt the med passes too long and draining, and did not like the ratio of 1:32 patients. Apparently that's not even a bad ratio for LTC! However, when short I would have to do TWO units, even on a day shift. During this time, I applied to the hospital multiple times and ended up landing a job on a busy medical floor. I didn't do too many shifts on my own before applying for another units that is essentially an LTC floor. I felt the medical unit to be way too busy for my first hospital job as there was far too many things I did not know to feel safe. I liked the LTC floor, but shortly after was redeployed back to medical, specifically the COVID unit. It wasn't bad as I never had more than 1 patient, if that! Now, I'm back to the LTC floor. It has changed now and is VERY heavy (locked unit, with lots of behaviours), back breaking, not enough staff!

I feel like I'm always complaining... and that's what my dad and husband say. The truth is , I'm not loving healthcare. My opinion, health care is not to my standards. I want to provide good care and protect my license. I feel it's impossible, wherever I go. Most of my friends/schools mates feel the same. DOES ANYONE LIKE NURSING ANYMORE? Does anyone else feel like this and did you get over it? Have I moved around too much to get a good feel? Should I give it more time?

Thanks for listening!!

[Fiona59]

Only you can decide if you want to invest anymore of your life in nursing.

You will always get the "there are lots of different areas of nursing, you don't have to settle" rah rah posts.

Ultimately, you have to decide if you want to keep trying, waiting for the dream job to become your reality. I'll be honest, it took 18 years for me to find my perfect job, and there is a good chance I will lose it when downsizing happens under the UCP government here in Alberta.

If I knew all of this 20 years ago when I was just starting my healthcare journey, I wouldn't have gone into nursing, I'd have gone clerical/administration.

[Hondagirl88]

Yes , I do understand strangers can't make the ultimate decision for me. But did you spend those 18 years being miserable? I get a lot of people don't like their jobs, and no job is perfect. I just hope that it will get better, and these feelings of negativity and hopelessness will subside.I certainly do not want to wait as long as you did. I'm glad your happy and I hope you get to keep your job, you definitely deserve to! If we only had a crystal ball ...

[GBC_Student, BSN, RN]

You may never love nursing or even like it. It took me three years of working my first job before I finally landed a better one. My current job isn't perfect but I've managed to bring down my 45 minutes of complaining to my partner when I finish a shift to under ten minutes. Joking aside I don't love being a nurse, it's a job that I sometimes take a lot of satisfaction from but usually it's a grind and I look forward to the end of the day. Try moving around if you can, try different jobs in nursing. You may never find one that you love but you may find one you can tolerate and feel okay with.

I also think it's okay to decide that it's just not for you if that's the case. I don't believe it's a failure on your part to leave nursing. I'm sure there are lots of school teachers, lawyers and plumbers who decide to leave their professions behind and try something new. Best of luck.

[Lucydog14]

I do really love being a nurse but I feel your frustration about the state of healthcare that prevents us from giving the kind of care we want to. I’m pretty happy working where I am now and I wouldn’t go back to the hospital setting I don’t think. In spite of it all I still have enjoyed the last 13 years. Sometimes you need to try other things until you find what you want.