I think I'm going to have to quit

dansamy · Aug 7, 2013

{{hugs}} I know it's hard! Take a deep breath. Write down ALL your options. Even ones you aren't fond of or think aren't all that viable. Then sleep on them. Literally. Fold it up, put it under your pillow. Sleep on it. Then, take each option & make a pro/con list. Sleep on those. Make an action plan. List the things you know you need to do. Prioritize them. And start getting them done.

mLPN79 · Aug 7, 2013

I am in a similar scenario where I have not been able to work all summer due to no childcare! It is so hard o find people you can trust and those who are decent caregivers. I'm waiting for school to resume so at least I can put one of my kids in before and after school care. We had my step daughter watching the kids for 7 months while she lived under our roof doing nothing for herself. Then she moved out and decided that she quit one day hours before I was due to work!! You just can't trust or rely on anyone anymore. Sorry I'm ranting a bit on your thread! But I can somewhat relate to your difficulties. Wish you all the best :) keep your chin up!

Morganalefey · Aug 7, 2013

I am in a similar scenario where I have not been able to work all summer due to no childcare! It is so hard o find people you can trust and those who are decent caregivers. I'm waiting for school to resume so at least I can put one of my kids in before and after school care. We had my step daughter watching the kids for 7 months while she lived under our roof doing nothing for herself. Then she moved out and decided that she quit one day hours before I was due to work!! You just can't trust or rely on anyone anymore. Sorry I'm ranting a bit on your thread! But I can somewhat relate to your difficulties. Wish you all the best :) keep your chin up!

Before and after school care for 3 kids will run me $150/week!! I can't afford that! I put an add out on care.com and only had a couple people interested (probably b/c of the few hours that are split up to before and after school), and was supposed to interview someone who was interested yesterday. 10 minutes before she was supposed to come over, she called and cancelled saying they were rushing her mom to the hospital. She sounded genuine, but I don't know. She is supposed to call back today, I guess I'll see what happens :/

IrishIzCPNP, MSN, RN, APRN, NP · Aug 7, 2013

Before and after school care for 3 kids will run me $150/week!! I can't afford that! I put an add out on care.com and only had a couple people interested (probably b/c of the few hours that are split up to before and after school), and was supposed to interview someone who was interested yesterday. 10 minutes before she was supposed to come over, she called and cancelled saying they were rushing her mom to the hospital. She sounded genuine, but I don't know. She is supposed to call back today, I guess I'll see what happens :/

How much do you earn a week? Do you need your job for income? $150 isn't bad to be honest. If you are working full time and you quit...what is your other option? I would so the math and really think about what happens if you quit.

Morganalefey · Aug 7, 2013

I make $720/week before taxes.

$150/week = $600/month. That's a lot of $$$! Especially since I only need about 2hrs/day.

I'm thinking about going into home health. I could start my day after the kids were at school. Then I could pay for after school care. I'd make more, and pay less. Plus I could probably pull off working 4 days instead of 5, which is pretty darn appealing.

Morganalefey · Aug 18, 2013

Just a lil' update on this :)

I did apply to a home health position, I have not heard anything about it yet. I'm back full time at the school now (school went back in session 8/13). Annnddd....yesterday, I get an email that any employee of my school (and some other places) get a 20% discount when you use the company that provides the before and after school care! That's like getting a free day! So, they will go every day before school, my bff will get them off the bus on WED, and my dad will get them off the bus another 2-3days/wk, so the remaining day or 2 they will go to after school care and then I will pick them up. I was so excited to get that email, I called right away and signed us up!

Unfortunately, issues with my mother in law have worsened, and she will only see my kids on holidays/bday's from now until the end of time! I cannot believe that disgusting human produced my wonderful husband! (sorry. side tracked. Rant over)

allnurses Guide · Aug 22, 2013

If grandma is dangerous to the well-being (physical or mental) of your children, her grandma card should be torn up and she should never be allowed to see the kids.

Glad you found an answer to your problem with childcare though.

Morganalefey · Aug 23, 2013

I wish I could cut her out completely. But, that is my husband's mother, and he still loves her, despite the disgusting things she has done.

She will only see them when there are LOTS of people around to monitor what words come out of her nasty mouth.

allnurses Guide · Aug 23, 2013

When your husband married you, he was supposed to change his loyalty to you. If she is really doing something destructive, it is up to him to tell her to knock it off or we won't be seeing you anymore.

Kids and wife come first. And vice versa . . . kids and husband come first . . . before the parents!

Morganalefey · Aug 26, 2013

You are very right!!! He has been behind me in ALL of this, for the record. He called her and told her she could not babysit anymore and why.

She hasn't seen my kids since she did what she did over a month ago. I don't know if/when she will see them again. She is very angry at me (she blames me for any decision we make that she doesn't like), so when Turkey day, my little guys bday and Christmas all roll around, I don't know that she will be willing to be around me long enough to see them, and she sure as h*ll won't be around them w/o me!

UGH. Family drama. I hate it. I hate her. I've never actually hated anyone in my life, but I hate her.

mLPN79 · Aug 26, 2013

Glad to hear things are looking up for you :) I live in Canada so wages and costs are quite a bit different but when I had to have all 3 children in care, it was costing me $600-$800/mo for the one full time and $800/mo for the other two needing before and after school care adding up to $1400-$1600 a month in childcare costs and very little government subsidy towards it!! Now all three are in school and my oldest can be home alone for a short time so i only have two requiring before and after. I've been working casual since I graduated 3 years ago and have not really advanced in my career. Ive been "stuck" working in psych and would realy love to get back to med/surg. the hospital i work at is so cliquey i dont stand a chance (or at least thats how it feels). Hoping things start looking up around here as well! All the best to you and I agree with the others, I would stay away from the MIL!!