I really need some support

[phoebebrat]

I'd like to hear from those of you that have ever been terminated from a job. Some of you may remember my post from about 2wks ago about the vanco/epi situation. I feel I was wrongfully terminated but that is no longer the point. Right now I need help with learning how to deal with my hurt feelings, embarassment, humiliation, crushed self-esteem. How have some of you gotten over a blow like this? I had no idea it would hurt so much to lose that job. And what do I do in a future interview when asked "why did you leave your last place of employment?" Why would anyone want to hire a nurse that was terminated from their last job?

Also, what other fields of nursing could I go into that aren't as stressful as med/surg? Thanks in advance for your reply's.

[DeLana_RN, BSN, RN]

I was forced to resign (threatened to get fired if I didn't) for absolutely nothing from my very first job (never quite figured this out, I was a new grad and think the head nurse just didn't like me, I didn't fit in, or something like that. I never made a major mistake.) You probably know how I felt at the time - betrayed, humiliated, utterly devastated.

I never saw it coming so I couldn't quit in time! And because of that, I was in a quandary for a while. Some applications contained the question "Where you ever terminated or asked to resign?" I felt that I needed to be honest and state "yes". As explanation I offered that the position was not a good fit (or something like that, it was a decade ago and I'm a bit foggy). Did it "cost" me a job? Maybe, when I reapplied with the very same hospital I didn't make it past HR. The other hospital in town, fortunately, did not ask this question in the application process and I certainly didn't volunteer the info! And yes, I was hired. I had no problem with another employer who asked this question, a dialysis clinic, after I explained what had happened.

BTW, I now work for the original hospital again, of course in another unit (the old head nurse was fired long ago). This time, the question re. termination was NOT on their application and I didn't mention it (they surely checked my old personnel file, but I was hired anyway). So I think this question is no longer considered very relevant (let's face it, many nurses in my position would have never mentioned this horrible first job; others lie. Any many of us were wrongfully terminated, I guess employers have figured this out by now). Also, the nursing shortage may have something to do with it. Anyway, I don't think you'll have any problem finding another job.

As for the emotional healing, this can take a while (OK, years in my case). In some ways, I guess, it haunts me still (but rarely). But you will get over this.

So sorry this happened to you.

All the best,

DeLana :icon_hug:

[TazziRN, RN]

first off, chin up! getting terminated is not the end of the world, even though it feels like it. if you made a genuine mistake (and if i remember your post correctly, that's what it was) and didn't cause harm by neglect or abuse, etc., then learn from this and move on. i was terminated from my last job last year and i believe it was unfairly......out of 5 people involved in the incident i was the only one terminated (i was also the only one who fessed up to my mistake and didn't try to hide or shift the blame). it turned out to be a blessing in disguise. i was honest with my prospective employer and she hired me anyway, and i love where i am now. i see it as god's plan......i needed to leave where i was and i wasn't going to do it on my own, so he made it happen.

[BrokenRNheart]

Many managers are not allowed to give a reference. Check with HR on the policy at your former hospital.

I am wondering what others have experienced. When I was searching for another job about 3 years ago - the 2 prospective employers that I had my eye on both wanted me to get references with previous managers. They made it clear that they wanted references and my permission because they did not just want HR time frames.

I got the feeling they knew they were guilty for slandering nurses and wanted the dirt. Turns out nothing came up and I was offered both jobs.