I quit my first nursing job while on orientation

[justjackie89]

I recently graduated in May 2013 with my BSN and was thrilled to accept what I thought was my dream job in labor and delivery. Initially, I was extremely excited during the first few weeks of orientation, but things started to go wrong. It started mostly with personal issues, and just to name a few:

I cancelled a wedding 3 months before the date, my family's home burned down, my family is completely displaced and my siblings don't know where to live, I broke my foot, and to top it all off, my brother was recently hospitalized and my sister is threatening to run away! Geesh!

Anyways, so while trying to manage all this personal stress, I am also trying to succeed at my job as a new RN in a high paced, high risk labor and delivery unit. Although there are days that I feel things are going well, most days I am fighting back tears and vomiting in the bathroom. My manager has been very understanding of all the stress and would check up on me to see how things were going. However, despite the fact that there were days that I could mask my stress and unhappiness, I just felt like the unit was not a good fit for me and ultimately started looking for a new job.

I was trying so hard to give this job time before leaving. Again, I was meeting with my manager, receiving encouragement, trying to encourage myself, taking things day by day. Despite all this, I still felt that the unit was too stressful for me (compounded by my personal stress) to manage any longer. I felt like no matter how hard I worked, it was never enough. I got stuck late so often (I'm definitely okay with helping out when needed), and one day got stuck 6 hours past my scheduled end time! I was constantly belittled by physicians and sometimes the residents, and some of the other nurses would even roll their eyes at me when I asked a question. Not everyone was like this, but it was enough to make me dislike the work environment. I felt so dissatisfied- I went into nursing to help others and make a difference - and I felt like I was so miserable that I was just a zombie at work trying desperately to make it through the day.

Ultimately, after not sleeping for over a week, going 2 days without eating and having several panic attacks, I quit. I was supposed to work 3rd shift that day and finally called someone from employee assistance with HR and told them that I was quitting. When they asked me to place a two week notice I told them that it was not possible and that I would not be coming for my shift that day. The woman I spoke with was very nice, said she understands and that it happens, and that she would let my supervisor know. I also typed up a letter of resignation and sent it to my supervisor. Its been two days and I have not heard anything from anyone.

I know that it would have been best to get a new job first before quitting, and to give two weeks notice, but I was physically, mentally and emotionally past my breaking point.

Now I begin the struggle of having to find a new job, and have no idea where to even start. I worked in labor and delivery for 5 months before quitting and believe that I did learn some useful skills that could help me find another job, however I am scared that it may in fact harm my potential prospects. I feel like I have applied to every job out there, and now I just have to be patient and I'm getting worried. I spent my free time even applying to non-nursing jobs just to make sure I have some sort of income, because I have no idea how long its going to take to find something. And of course, I want to get a job that I believe is a good fit for me, because I don't want to end up in the same situation.

I've also applied to graduate school for Human Resources, as I don't think that more education is a bad idea and this could apply to a health care role. I still want to give nursing a shot, but don't want to limit my other options. I'm just praying that I find my way, and I keep telling myself that everything will be okay.

I thank anyone who read my very long story, and any input is appreciated. If anyone has been in a similar situation, please share your story and outcome! ... and how you managed all the stress of quitting and having to find a new job against steeper odds!

Also suggestions on places to look for jobs is appreciated, I live in the Milwaukee area of SE Wisconsin.

[HouTx, BSN, MSN, EdD]

It seems as though you have been through an emotional wringer - which drove you to make a rash decision to quit without notice. Unfortunately, this is likely to have lasting effects on your job search. Your employer has undoubtedly categorized you as "not eligible for rehire", which is automatically done for anyone who does not give proper notice of resignation. Whenever a prospective employer checks your employment history, this is going to a huge red flag, particularly since you were still in orientation.

Have you sought any professional counseling so that you can improve your coping skills? If not, you may find yourself repeating the same scenario in any job you take because there is no such thing as a stress-free job. I hope your personal situation has stabilized and that you are able to find a new job soon.