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I keep rescheduling NCLEX, Help!!

by mapleandgrass mapleandgrass (New) New

Hi. I'm Maple. I've rescheduled NCLEX for six times now and I know that I need to stop doing it but I just can't seem to focus on studying.

I've graduated my BSN degree this June 2016 in the Philippines. It's considered a prestigious university in my home country and everyone is expected to easily pass NCLEX. Even before plus after graduation, we had review classes/mock tests for 2 months which I barely attended but somehow managed to pass. Mostly I think because of gut feelings and lucky guesses.

I went to USA on the last week of September and got my ATT on the second week of October. Everyone in my family expected me to take the exam asap like after a week or so. But I lied about the available test dates and said the earliest was November 8. They bought it. I was feeling so much pressure but I thought I could do it, I still had 3 weeks to study. But I did not study. Not seriously. I didn't even do anything to keep the nursing knowledge fresh in my mind. I was just on the internet most times of the day. So I told them that I am rescheduling it to November 22. But then a lot of more family problems came up and I had to schedule it on November 28. I thought I could make do with it. I made study schedule every single day but I wasn't able to accomplish even half of it. I then scheduled it to December 6 and then December 9. I thought I could do it by December 9. My older siblings who are all nurses are starting to say a lot of hurtful words that pressures me even more. I really want to take it too but I haven't even began to study properly and am very unconfident. My mind feels empty and every time I answer NCLEX questions, I feel like I don't know anything. I initially rescheduled it to December 19 but that test date is no longer available after some more reschedulings so now I'm stuck on December 21.

This is my last chance. I know that I just can't take it carelessly without proper study because I would fail but I just don't know what to do to really study. I can't seem to concentrate at all. Since the last year of college, I've been very easygoing. I've been really lazy about studying. But I've also always been anxious about taking the NCLEX.

Right now, I am so anxious and scared. I really can't afford to fail because everyone thinks I've been studying for this seriously for like 6 months now. But I haven't. Not at all. I feel like if I fail this, I will be devastated and lose all hope that I have left.

Now I am feeling even more concerned because students here are graduating this December and surely they will take the test soon. Then I will have to compete against them to get a job and I know it's gonna be really tough since I'm a foreign graduate with no job experience whatsoever. I'll have an even fewer chance to get a job. I feel like an even more of a loser.

I also worry about having to take and pass the ACLS course before or after the NCLEX. I really need to get a job by next month but now I know that's gonna be next to impossible and that depresses me. I feel like everyone is disappointed in me. I am very disappointed with myself.

But I just don't know what to do. When I begin to read the study materials, I get so so nervous that I can't finish anything. Then I'd just go to the internet to calm myself. Like now. I can't focus. My head feels like it's gonna explode.

Has anyone ever felt this way? How did you get through it?

I am taking mine in january. I think i delayed it too much that most of my friends were already done with the exam and passed it. I even recently quit my job as an LVN just to focus on this exam. Been studying going 3 months now, until i take it in january. You can do this, u still have a couple of weeks to go.