How do you stay nonjudgmental?

[TigerGalLE]

How do you try to care when you know that the patient's lifestyle has caused their disease. Whether it be sex, drugs, alcohol? I had a patient today that was very sick due to their lifestyle choices. They were very rude, hateful, particular, and flat out annoying.. I found it very difficult to be empathetic for this patient. It got to the point where I couldn't stand to be in the room anymore.. This patient was flat out disgusting.. They would try to wipe their stool on me purposely, talk very nasty and cuss. I don't even know if i can stand to take care of this person tomorrow. I'm not even going to tell you the nasty things they did today. It just makes me sick.... How do you stay empathetic???

Tiger

[TigerGalLE, BSN, RN]

This patient didn't have AIDS dementia... They were completely A&O. I had the same patient the next day and it wasn't as bad. However I really just did what I had to do for the patient and didn't spend anymore time in the room than I had to. The patient had the attitude that everyone was out to get them. They thought everything I said was a lie. For example... when trying to give the patient acyclovir for their herpes... They would say they weren't taking it. I would just tell them that they had the right to refuse but the medicine would help them. My feelings were not going to be hurt if you don't take your medicine because it is for you own good and you own health. The minute I would try to take the medicine back they would take it. I just had to change the way I communicated with the patient. I quit being nice. Not that I was necessarily mean to them. I Just wasn't going to put up with anything the next day. And the patient knew it.

Luckily I'm not back until Friday. We often get patients that are like this. It is very frustrating. Usually I'm able to just be nice to the patient and they are at least decently nice back. This patient was just mean, ugly and hateful and it didn't matter what I did or what I didn't do. They were going to act that way no matter what....

[anonymurse]

However, what OP and many are speaking of here is not "blame" but observation of the universal laws of cause and effect.

I don't see anyone meditating on the universal laws of cause and effect. But every day, I see the work of nurses who do their job to the best of their ability for all pts no matter what, and I hear the complaints of other nurses who believe they shouldn't have to do their best if they've judged others unworthy of their best care.