How to leave your work at work?

[CBsMommy]

I need to know how you leave your work at work when you go home for the day. Any tips/tricks? Is this easier with experience?

I'm a student, currently in my Peds class, and I LOVE kiddos! I am a Mommy to a 4 year old and he is the light of my life! The problem is, I'm an emotional wreck! We start talking about end of life care for the kids and I just fall apart, SPLAT, right in the middle of class. I can't seem to get a hold of the water works and it's just plain embarrassing! We start clinicals at the end of this week and I am looking forward to working with the kids BUT I'm not looking forward to dealing with children who are forgotten, abused, and dying. I know it's about trying to make a difference in their lives but I really don't think that I'll be able to hold it together.

So, to those of you who are very experienced, how do you cope? How do walk into an abused child's room and not break down into tears? How do you leave their room and go home and live your life? Please, do tell, I'm in dire straights here. Thanks in advance!

[perfectbluebuildings, BSN, RN]

It is hard to see children who have been abused. That is something that never gets easier. But you learn to wall off a little bit of that emotion so that you can give good care to the patient. You focus on what you can do right now for that child to make their day better; sometimes it's giving medication for their pain, sometimes it's holding/rocking them, sometimes it's making sure your notes are very detailed so that social services can do their job the best way possible, and there are many other things. Yes, I get very angry every time I care for a child who has been abused. I may cry about their situation on my way home. I hate that they have been hurt by someone who should have been caring for them. But I can also see that most of the time, they are out of that situation now and on their way to being in a safe, loving home.

As far as pediatric death, that is also something that is never easy, but you are focusing again on what you can do for the patient and his/her family at the time. It's okay to be sad; it's okay to cry a bit with them and their parents; as long as the family is not having to comfort you. If you do end up in pediatrics, your co-workers will also (hopefully) be a big support for you in situations like this.

There are threads on this forum and on the PICU forum also that have a lot of people's advice and thoughts on dealing with pediatric death and other difficult situations... Look them up b/c they are very helpful and useful. Take care and good luck in clinicals- Most of the time, pediatrics really is a happy place :)