helpless, hopeless & frustrated

[registerednut1221]

I am so emotionally exhausted and think I am just long overdue for a good cry. There must have been some sort of special on crazy families and we racked up. We have one patient with a daughter-in-law that comes in to start trouble almost every day. She goes so far as to make things up like...pt hasn't had a bath in a week, (pt weighs nearly 400#s and has c-diff----she gets a full bath probably 4 times a day because she's in such a mess from the diarrhea) pt c/o chest pain and no one ever came (total BS). She says that a staff member told pt to shut up or she would be locked in her room (it's a small facility and pt's room is less than 20 ft from the desk. If anyone had said that, everyone would have heard it) She actually came out in to the hallway at shift change the other night and started yelling and swearing at the desk! At this point she is demanding that we call our administrator (now mind you that the family had already changed their password at this point and told us that she is to have no information about this patient and they had all been informed that if there were any further issues this family member would be escorted off the premises) So we called the cops, had her escorted out of the building and locked the door behind her. We had to have a guard posted at the door (of a 40 bed facility!!!) to keep this nutcase out. The patient is a sweetheart and is a bit confused so she really doesn't understand what happened, but was still quite upset by the whole episode. As if that weren't enough drama for one lifetime we also have another patient with a crazy wife and daughter who thinks it a good idea to threaten to sue everyone all the time. This poor man is ESRD, COPD and had a big fat sacral decub. We had placed a wound vac (which is the only way this wound will ever heal), but the family wanted the wound vac ripped off and completely changed 4-5 times a day EVERY time he had a bm. Not that it was soiled (because it was sealed) but just because it "seems" nasty. We tried to explain how a wound vac works, but they wouldn't hear of it so we were forced to take the wound vac off and are now watching this decub get bigger and bigger. He was supposed to go for vein mapping last week, but the family didn't understand what vein mapping meant (even after the nephrologist had explained) and threatened to sue us if the patient was taken for this procedure! We had a bed held for him at another facility that takes dialysis patients but they refused it and pitched a major fit saying that they were sure the patient had a concussion from a fall over a week ago at our facility (while they were in the room)...CT was negative just so you know. NOW, after they need our "incompetent" staff to come in every time this man sneezes or takes a deep breath, they have demanded that they are taking him HOME. They can't get him to the side of the bed without assistance and they think they are going to be able to get him in and out of a car 3x's a week for dialysis and they're going somehow manage to change his sacral dressing when bm freaks them out???? They have refused any medical equipment (bed, wc, bsc). 3 docs and the discharge nurse have tried to convince them that they may be trying to take on too much, but they are certain that once they get him home he will be fine??? I could almost understand if they were going home with hospice so that he would be comfortable and enjoy his last days, but I know they are going to get him home and get themselves into a situation that is not going to end well for him. I adore this man and I want nothing more than for him to be comfortable, but this is not a good situation. It feels as though someone (albeit with good intentions) is ripping my child from my arms and there is nothing I can do to stop it. Now, we just sit back and wait for it all to go straight to #@&& and get slapped with a big lawsuit for allowing them to get themselves into the situation they are heading for. Damned if you do and damned if you don't. I LOVE my work and I can't imagine myself doing anything else, but sometimes I just need a stiff drink and a big box of kleenex!!!

[frodo]

Oh, dear, sounds like you have had enough on your plate lately.

take that stiff drink and get the kleenex, sometimes a good cry does wonders. we also have had pts and families who think they are in a 5 star hotel. i don't understand it. but just take it every day at a time. I hope your load lifts soon. I feel for you!

[ktwlpn, LPN]

Can't social service take immediate action and contact adult protective services?...They had better do somethiing STAT to stop the madness.The powers-that-be should NOT have let this situation go this far.Good Luck

[leslie :-D]

The powers-that-be should NOT have let this situation go this far.Good Luck

exactly.

removing a wound vac to placate the family?

families not only interfere, but do so to the detriment of the pt.

someone from the top, should have advised them to either go w/the plan of care, or be assisted in finding another facility.

someone needs to start putting their darned feet down to these ignorant people.

leslie

[squeakykitty]

Some families are a danger. Having the wound vac replaced that often is not necessary. Those families need some limits.