Having a really hard time during my first semester

sbostonRN · Oct 19, 2008

I can't tell you if it gets better or not, but I can tell you that I'm feeling the exact same way. I'm in an evening ADN program and a lot of the students are married with kids. I am younger than all of them (some could be my mother) and I feel outcasted. Some of it is probably my own doing because I"m so self-conscious.

I've also messed up BPs and pulses in front of my clinical instructor, with a patient right there. Just keep practicing and showing her/him that you want to learn and get better, and they are pretty forgiving. Remember that they probably struggled at one point too.

I've also set up a meeting with my faculty advisor next week. I'm hoping she tells me I'm at the level I should be, and not to worry about these things. Everyone I"ve talked to has suggested talking to an advisor...they are the ones who know your program and know what's "normal" for your level in school.

Good Luck to you and I hope you (and I) find your stride soon!

gillytook · Oct 19, 2008

Hang in there. My first semester was nearly impossible. All I did was study and read. I ate with my nose in my books. If it had not been for family cooking, I probably would not have eaten. I am third semester now and life is much better. I have finally gotten the hang of critical thinking. All the mountain of information and skills they crammed into me first semester seem like second nature. Things I thought I could never remember such as lab values are common knowledge. They have to put soooo much information into you that first semester as a foundation for what is come in addition to teaching you an entirely new way of thinking. I does get easier. The information will be reinforced and expanded upon. You will use it and practice it in a clinical setting. Just remeber to develop your study and test taking skills also as these will help lighten the learning load.

chevyv, BSN, RN · Oct 19, 2008

I'm in 4th semester and still struggle. I just finished my last big theory class and it was the most difficult theory class of the whole program! I thought it would be the easiest, but it sucked!! I'm so grateful that I made it, but I feel that way after every class (especially when I see the ones that don't make it). Our school changed the last theory at the beginning of this semester after they learned of their pass rate for the NCLEX (worst scores ever- 50 something %- UGH!!). It was difficult to adjust because I was prepared for something totally different.

I hope it gets better for you as the semesters go by. I too was a 4.0 student and this last class I earned a C (and was happy). Good luck!!

dorselm · Oct 19, 2008

I will be graduating in Dec 08 from a diploma program that has a NCLEX pass rate of 95% so believe me, I know all too well about what you're going through. My first semester, I barely passed. I was soo scared that I wouldn't make it. Our school starts 100's , 200's, 300's , then transitions and 400's(NCLEX prep). So in my 100's while alot of the other students were getting A's or B's I was getting a 76% which is the minimum passing grade for our school. After that, I just started practicing nclex questions and studying my notes as much as possible. When we got to the 200's, I heard that these were really difficult classes so I got scared again, so much so that I scared myself into failing the first test! There was no reason I should have failed. After that I gave myself the pep talk that I needed and got through. As for making friends, that will come when you get into clinical groups. You will be working with a particular group of people for about 7-8 weeks and you will get to know them better by the time the clinical is over. Then you'll move on to another clinical group, you may keep some of the original people in the first group or get an entire new group. Then you will make more friends. It will come don't worry about it. The other things is, in making new friends, you are gonna find there's more people in you class feeling the same way you do so hang in there. By the time your third semester comes, you will put everything together and it will make more sense. :up:

avahnel, ASN, RN · Oct 20, 2008

I'm sorry you are struggling so much. Is there someone you can talk to on campus? I know I was thinking of calling and setting up an appt for a visit with the therapist for the school, just because in NS there is so much stress!!!!! Hang in there!! I'll be praying for you!!

SteveNNP, MSN, NP · Oct 20, 2008

My first semester was very difficult. I believe it's a time when the "weak" get weeded out. Those of us who made it through survived the rest of school no problem.

Hang in there. It sounds like you have the motivation and drive to make it!

mzattitude · Oct 20, 2008

I'm really sorry that u are feeling this way. I can relate to u on so many levels too, because my semester started off kinda crappy too!

My niece passed away, my original instructor resigned, and I am also struggling with anxiety issues.

^With this being said. I think that things can get better for u if u start thinking positive. Just don't let your emotional state fog your view. You can get through this. You have made it this far. As for your BP and pulse checkoffs, were u able to retake them? You were probably just really nervous having someone stand over you, as the rest of us get.

It's completely normal. The number one thing u shouldn't do is beat urself up over your mistakes. Mistakes are our foundation to learn. Everyone makes mistakes. Some people just take them a little harder. I'm sure that everyone in ur clinical group has made a mistake at one point or another.

Just be strong and keep that positive attitude about wanting to become a nurse. Don't forget why you wanted to become a nurse. Everytime I get discourage, I sit back and think about why I wanted to be a nurse in the first place.

I knew I wanted to be a nurse since I was about 17 years old. Everyone always told me how nice I was and how much of a great person I was. So I decided to become a nurse, because then I could still be myself (a nice person), but help someoen out in the process.

Don't forget who u are and why u wanted to be a nurse. Why did u want to be a nurse? Do u mind sharing with everyone?

bamagt · Oct 20, 2008

I'm in my 4th semester and all I can say is, it gets so much easier. When I started my 1st semester I was recovering from a pretty bad car wreck. I had multiple broken bones and head trauma- I probably should have waited to start school but I did it anyway. I thought that 1st semester was going to be a breeze since I worked in a hospital but it definetly wasn't.

You just have to learn what each teacher likes to know on their tests and you'll do fine in that aspect.

Clinical wise is more difficult sometimes. Most everything was pretty easy for me during 1st semester but you have to know that you're going to make some mistakes, you are a student!

That is why we are in school, to learn! We don't know everything.

Just take your time on tests and in clinicals and don't freak out. I promise you'll do fine!!!

jpeters84 · Oct 20, 2008

Thank you everyone for your encouragement. It means so much to read these replies and to know that others have been there and to hear words of wisdom. I took today off. Off from studying and I was lazy and watched movies and slept on and off all day and I feel so much better. I was able to get my pulse and BP checked off no problem at open lab on Saturday. I was just really nervous at my skills check off and it just brought up bad memories of failing in front of everyone. It was really just a bad situation for me. But I am moving forward and moving on. Starting tomorrow I am throwing myself back into my studies, I am metting with my professors at their office hours to get a better idea of what they are looking for and I am getting a better mor positive attitude.

As far as you question, mzattitude, the reason I want to be a nurse goes along way back. I knew as a kid that I wanted to be a nurse and I use to make my mom drive me to salvation army to buy crutches for my fake hospital at home. I use to make my own casts with elmers glue and Johnson and Johnson gauze. While other girls were saving their allowances for candy I was saving up to buy another first aid kit at the store. Every Halloween I dressed up as a nurse. When I went to college the first time I had this amazing history class and I got side tracked and got into poltical science and history and ended up getting a degree in history and working in politics. But I got really burned out from politics and one day at my friends suggestion, I went to job shadow my friend who is a Neonatal NP. I remember walking onto the floor and seeing all the babies in the NICU and meeting the nurses and absolutely falling in love with the profession all over again. I have never had such a profound and powerful revelatory moment that this, nursing, is exactly what i should be doing with my life. I quit my job in DC moved back to California and worked three jobs while I did my nursing prerequsities at a local community college and I haven't regreted it for a moment. I may be really struggling right now, but I know it's something I need to work through to accomplish my goal, my dreams. And I knew it wasn't going to be easy. So I'm just going to take my strength from all of your responses and use it to empower me forward past this rough patch and on to hopefully a better future. Thank you all very much, I really appreciate the support.

missmatched · Oct 21, 2008

Apparently, there are so many of us in the same boat. Just last week I got a C in Patho/Pharm. I cried that night then marshalled whatever I had left to take the Assessment test the next day(which mercifully for my frazzled nerves was an A). I really want to keep my A's,they just looked good when they're all lined up:wink2:. But my teacher said we have to get over this grade business and just be happy we're passing. In the past, in Microbiology I employed flashcards, recordings, notes and book readings. I may have to do that again. I hate memorizing but I know I have to. I listen very well during lecture but somehow it does not translate to A's. I may have to be contented with a B on this course, that is if I don't screw it up further.

I just want my grades to reflect the time and effort I've spent on studying. Good luck all. Persevere.

whiteoleander5 · Oct 22, 2008

Like all of us on this post, it took me so long and so much hard work to get into nursing school. I have never wanted something more in my life. The time has finally come and I am half-way through my first semester. I don't want to sound like I'm complaining, I'm just really surprised that I am having such a hard time. I was never that great of a student before going back to school to become a nurse but I made myself get disciplined and worked my behing off to get great study habits and maintain a 4.0 for my nursing pre-reqs. Now that I got into a good BSN program not only am I so emotionaly, physically, and mentally exhausted but I'm struggling with school. Each day is worse then the next. I feel like every professor is trying to intimidate us and they are just throwing down the gauntlet on us to see how much we can handle. The pressure has gotten so intense, the tests have been non-stop, and I'm not loving it like I thought I would be. I knew nursing school was going to be tough but this was more than I expected.
I've finally just reached this state of exhaustion and despair. We had our clinical skills check off and I got so nervous I completely screwed up taking pulse and BP. I can certainly do pulse and BP. It was so awful and embaressing and I think dissaspointing for my clinical instructor, that one of her students messed up on this. I just wanted to die. I moved far away from home to attend this nursing school and it's been slow going to make friends. All of the other people in the program are married or have boyfriends or just don't understand me so I feel really alone in this. I want to ask others, is the first semester generally this difficult? What does it mean that I'm not liking it that much, does it get better? Did anyone have this hard of a time in the beginning but then hit their stride? I'm just really having a hard time...

I think you need this: :icon_hug:... Also, I wanted to share with you that I am in my first semester and feel the exact same way as you! It can be very lonely sometimes and downright terrifying. The first few weeks I was so distraught, I thought I was losing my mind.. I couldnt imagine why I felt so upset when this is something I wanted so desperately. It really just took me awhile to get into the swing of it all, but I also went to the DR and got medicine. I am now on zoloft for anxiety... and it has helped significantly. To be honest, I dont think I am completely "with it" yet, but I certainly dont feel as lost as I was... I take each week at a time. (And occasionally each day...) It has gotten better for me. Perhaps its because my anxiety (thanks zoloft!) has dwindled a bit, but I feel okay with school now. Im not a crying mess like I was...:imbar

Oh, and for my vital signs check off, my instructor told me that I had to wait because my hands were shaking so badly... I thought I was going to pass out!... But I thankfully did pass. But when I'm nervous, I feel like all logic flies out the window.

I feel that nursing school is a rollercoaster of emotions. Some days you come home saying "Oh my god, this is PERFECT for me, I want to do this for the rest of my life" and other days you come home saying "Whats wrong with me? How am I going to do this?"... Its been the most eye opening experience of my life so far.

You sound like you really want to be a nurse-- as long as you really want it, I think everything else will fall into place...Good luck!:redbeathe