My grandmother has dementia, and my family and I have been taking turns giving her full time care. It is very hard on us, and she has finally agreed to move into an assisted living facility. I think that will make our interactions so much more enjoyable. But as her dementia is getting worse, she has been having more episodes of confusion, thinking that her parents are still alive and that they live just down the street. Her oldest son also recently died, and my family told her about it, but she often forgets that and asks where he is.
My inclination is to act like I don't know, rather than break the news again that her son is dead and her parents have been dead for decades. My parents feel that they need to remind her when she gets confused, to try to minimize her confusion. I don't always feel that this is the best way to interact with her, since inevitably she will go back to her reality where everyone is alive and she still needs to get her parents' approval before she moves to a new place.
