Vent session..any advice? - page 2

Ok, so I am a home health aide and have been with the same client for over 6 months. The client is an especially difficult one at times but very sweet also. I am with her most often but there is... Read More

  1. by   caliotter3
    Quote from FireStarterRN
    As you say, you are on their turf which basically puts you totally under their thumb. You are working for a for profit agency, I would guess. They, most likely, will do everything in their power to avoid confronting a paying customer. You are in the home of a controlling, neurotic woman, and there's very little you can probably do about the whole situation.
    Except leave the case. Does your agency know you are quitting in August? If they do, they might not work very hard at giving you a replacement client. So you will probably just have to do the best you can and count the days until August. Hang in there.
  2. by   FireStarterRN
    Quote from caliotter3
    Except leave the case. Does your agency know you are quitting in August? If they do, they might not work very hard at giving you a replacement client. So you will probably just have to do the best you can and count the days until August. Hang in there.
    Which is exactly what I did. It's called voting with your feet.
  3. by   augiebear
    thanks for the input guys..my agency doesn't know yet..I am waiting a bit before they tell the clients daughter and she has a nervous breakdown..lol..but yeah, I will most likely tough it out until I leave, but I plan on addressing the issues of the patients safety and my responsibilities when they come up, although the client will not like that at all and it may be an uncomfortable situation. I did it for 6 months, what's 2 more, atleast that is what I will tell myself:icon_roll Until then, I will be counting the days!!

    and you hit it on the nose..control freak and neurotic!!
  4. by   FireStarterRN
    You should have seen the parents of the quadriplegic man I cared for. And the family was just about as dysfunctional as can be. I wouldn't be surprised if the Mom wasn't praying the rosary on her many smoke breaks, she was constantly going out for a cigarette and she was very religious, into every offbeat Catholic apparition there was, anything but her local priest and parish, they were all against her according to her.

    With her, every day was 'train the nurse day', as she went over positioning, touted her knowledge, and basically acted as if the nurse was her student. The woman was an RN but had only ever worked on a very part time basis as a school nurse. Even in nursing school she had actually reported on one of the nuns to the board of nursing or something like that.

    Her thing was to badger her son, who was in his 30s and had been severely brain-damaged in the one car accident. He was totally contracted and non-verbal. She would want to get him up with the hoyer and bark out commands to him to uncurl his hands, hold up his head, she just wouldn't let up on him. He couldn't even track with his eyes, and he had an implanted baclofen pump but he was totally contracted nonetheless.

    I also had to hear about how all her other children weren't talking to her. One daughter was a lesbian and they had told her to never come back. She spent much of her day on the phone, bullying medical supply company and other people involved with his care.

    I was only going in once or twice a week, but the nurse who was full time on the case was just about going bananas. We ended up becoming friends and comparing notes on this nutty woman. She went to the staffing company but they were not interested in doing anything other than placating this woman. I finally just quit along with everyone else on the case.
  5. by   augiebear
    oh my goodness..craziness!!! Why are people like this? The world may never know..the daughter of my client has actually been dropped from a couple of agencies so I've heard. She was with this agency and they dropped her so get this...she talked the caregiver from that company to quit that company, which paid $2 more than mine, and then she talked to my company and got them to hire her so that she could still use her as her caregiver..she lasted only a month and then I took over..Crazy yeah..I think this lady would make a killing selling cars or Avon
    thanks for all your input and stories guys, and keep 'em coming. I feel better now and it's good to know that people understand where I am coming from.Thanks a lot!!
  6. by   FireStarterRN
    When I left this case that I've described, I wrote a letter to the parents with suggestions for them to consider, such as ways to be more respectful and considerate of their son and his human dignity. I gave it a lot of thought. I strategically hid several copies of it for them to find later. These people, in their own way, did care, but had huge control issues.

    I've since run into the mother of the patient, and I also cared for him in the local hospital. She is very warm and appreciative of me. Her son has since passed away. I do think she cared for her son. He was impeccably cared for on many levels, even if she drove everyone crazy in the process.
  7. by   augiebear
    I think your case has similarities to mine..I know that she cares but yeah, her controlling ways and treatment of the home health aides have already driven some away and will probably continue to do so. Writing a letter is a good idea, I feel like they need to be told like how you told your clients mother, but with me still there, it would be way too weird, maybe I will do what you did when it is time to leave. And perhaps she is going through distress and denial about her mom's illness, maybe I could refer her to some support groups that may help.

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