only a nurses aide

[twee426]

Hi my name is Teresa and I am new here. My dad is in Hospice (in his home). He has end stage congestive heart failure. He was told he had 6 months to live. He's been hanging on for about 3 years now I think. He's been fairly independant in his apartment ...using a walker and a cane. His nurse comes once a week and I am over there frequently (shopping, cleaning etc....). For the past couple of months he has been having trouble with holding food down. This last week he has fallen twice ....his pee is very dark...throws up everything he eats. He's saying how cold he is and weak. I am feeling like this might be the end. Is throwing your food up part of the end? Last week he was saying he was hungry....yesterday was the first time he said he didn't want any food. any info would be greatly appreciated.

[Blackcat99]

Update on my dad....His nurse came in yesterday and stated he was dehydrated from all the vomiting I suppose.(she determined it was old blood)... Ordered clysis.....??? what is that? My dad is under DNR....Hospice in home....I am wondering first of all what clysis is??? Also if my dad has wishes of dying naturally and he has stopped eating and basically shutting down....Is it wrong to have him getting fluids subcutaneously?? He's getting 50cc......only 2 liters and his nurse ordered 24 hr nursing til the immediate crisis is over. I am power of attorney and told the nurse ok....am I going against the DNR deal here? Am I prolonging the inevitable? The nurse believes he is in the pre-active phase of dying....Thanks, Teresa

I think clysis can be different things. It can be used to just give fluids and it can also be used to give pain/nausea meds subcutaneous. If it is being used in medication to give relief from pain and nausea then I think it is good. If its just plain fluids I don't think it is a good idea. Anyway, you are the POA so you decide what you think Dad would want. My prayers are with you.

(((((((((((((((Hugs)))))))))))))

[twee426]

Update: My dad passed away dec. 26 at 5:25pm. I now understand what the death rattle is. I read a book called Final Gifts (by 2 hospice nurses...Maggie Callanan and Patricia Kelley)......I'm not sure if I found out about this book through this site or a hospice site. This book really shed some insight into what I was witnessing with my dad. I would have really missed out on some very special moments had I not been aware of what to look for. I was able to hear my dad say off the wall statements and know that there was a meaning to them. I was there holding my dads hand along with my sister.....listening to Elvis Gospel Music.....when he took his last breath. I can't really explain it but it was a very peaceful moment. No gasping or fighting for air. He just stopped breathing and went to sleep. What an awesome way to go. Thankyou......Teresa

[RazorbackRN, BSN, RN]

I am so sorry for your loss. May God continue to bless you and your family and be with you during this difficult time.

[Blackcat99]

I am sorry to hear about the death of your father. So glad that you were able to be with your Dad when he took his last breath. My prayers are with you.