Knowing all too much

[pyxeduhst5282]

Ok...This is a random question for you all and I'm not sure if this was the best forum to post in...but anyway...here goes. Life is a bit difficult these days for me. First off..I'm in the AF and stationed about 9 hours away from home...really not too far, but I don't get home NEARLY as much as I'd like. Anyhow..I was wondering if any of you guys have been in this situation and how you've coped. My dad...Who's 56 yo is a very stubborn man who I love dearly. He has Diabetes (diagnosed when I was probably in the 8th grade...and I'm 23 now) and pretty much ever since I can remember, he's been non-compliant as far as diet/exercise/blood sugar monitoring goes. He pretty much eats whatever he wants...regardless of the sugar/carb content..and takes a bunch of meds to control not only his blood sugar, but his BP and cholesterol too. His Doctor has wanted to put him on insulin for a few years now....but he refuses...He has neuropathy in his feet (over the summer he was wearing a pair of shoes that were too tight he didn't feel this and ended up with a "shoe bite"and badly infected ankle. After that he got nervous and began taking his blood sugar daily and attempted to watch his diet...but now that we're in October...he's back to his old routine. The other day he said to me..."The doctor wants me to see a kidney specialist and go for a lung MRI...but don't worry...I'm fine" (he smoked for many years too...and has bad asthma) Anyway...knowing this...while I'm 9 hours from home kills me. It kills me more because...as a nurse...I've seen what can happen. I try so hard to get him to see my point of view. It's so hard for me to accept the fact that my dad has just given up. It so selfish to me...yet I love him so much. It worries me to think how my mom will do if god forbid something happens to him. He keeps telling me "Only the good die young...I'm gonna be around forever". He's always saying he's fine...but never confronts his health issues. (his whole family is pretty much diabetic/overweight...I believe his mom actually had her leg amputated secondary to diabetes) Guess the bottom line is...Knowing the consequences of poorly managed health issues....I'm DYING inside...I feel like I'm wasting precious time with him being in the AF and 9 hrs from home. Any advice or uplifting comments are appreciated....and sorry I babbled for so long....have a good night~

[NorthernRose]

Have you tried the ol' guilt trick with him? I did that with my husband....he was a smoker, I said you know if you died I'd cry and miss you. He quit smoking within a month!!! Maybe the same thing could work on your dad!!

Dad's hate to have their daughters sad or cry!!Maybe if you told him just how devestated you would be with out him in your life, or in the lives of his future grandchildren......??? It might just be a kickin his butt he needs!! Good luck!!

[Tweety, BSN, RN]

I see the same thing in my mother, who is having chronic problems due to poor decisions in the past. I feel your pain and hope your dad does what he can while he can, but it sounds like he's in for some chronic problems.

Best of luck.

[Hellllllo Nurse, BSN, RN]

Could you send him a copy of your post?

Knowing you are so worried about him to the point of distraction really might guilt him into changing a bit, and seeing the effect his behaviors has on his family....