Help :(

[CardiacDork]

I'm not sure if I'm asking for advise or just venting but a recent interaction with a man, relationship is becoming more serious and grounded with time may be taking me up to North East Texas. I'm a city nurse from the large Houston Metro area. I've only ever worked in a teaching facility with tons of residents and at level one trauma centers.

I am honestly terrified of what I'll encounter at smaller community hospitals. 3:1 ratios? Lower acuity? No learning opportunities????

These decisions are difficult and I truly care for this man but I want to be somewhere where I will succeed and be happy. I am a career man.

Any recommendations on North East TX hospitals? Longview TX/Tyler TX/Nacogdoches TX????

what hospitals do I stay away from?

as much as I love my career and my current job I also am willing to make it work with this person.

fyi I work ICU and would like to remain in ICU for right now... I will not work medsurg

I am open to OR/PACU/Cath Lab...

[Nurseways]

Congrats, on the new relationship! I love the idea of working one day a month as sort of a trial.

There is something about the new phase of the relationship, heart racing, daydreaming, loving the sound of a voice. Most of this is hormone related, btw. But it sure is nice.

Now, how invested are you at your current job? Can He move to you, or is that out of the question? My other suggestion would be if you are set on making this move, stay prn at your current job, and work there occassionally. You would be able to keep up your skills, and maybe come back.

As a Mom, I would say that right now you are in the "honeymoon" phase. Everything is perfect. The real test of any relationship is:

How well you as a couple react to adversity

Have you had your first argument yet?

How will finances be handled

How are your communication skills as a couple?

I wish you the best whatever you decide. And if you move North they will be damn lucky to have you!

[LibraNurse27, BSN, RN]

This post is really interesting to me as an LGBT nurse working in a small community hospital in a relatively rural area. I agree with above posters that you can learn and see a lot in a community hospital. Unfortunately it is often due to a lack of funds and resources but I definitely have more autonomy than I did when I worked at a larger hospital. You will definitely get to use your clinical judgment! One thing that can be difficult as an LGBT person is moving to a more rural area where people are not as accepting of LGBT people. I have had a few issues with this but find that once people get to know me their views tend to change or at least they are not openly hostile. I would definitely do some research and ask around about how LGBT friendly the areas are. I really hope it works out for you both in the relationship and the job if you decide to move. Keep us posted!

[klone, MSN, RN]

As someone who has had a VERY eye-opening experience with rural communities (seen the stuff in the news in the past week about the LGBTQ teen who was forced by the high school principal to read from the bible as punishment? Yeah, that my community), you may also want to consider whether or not a rural community in Texas is going to be very gay friendly or overall a welcoming, tolerant community that you want to settle into.

Edited to add: Or, what LibraNurse just said above.

[klone, MSN, RN]

But, in defense of small community hospitals, I can only speak from the perspective of OB/newborns, but the nurses I work with now are some of the best, most competent nurses for stabilizing unstable patients that I've EVER seen. If I had a sick newborn or preemie, there is nobody I would rather have taking care of them than these nurses. NICUs get them after they've been stabilized. These are the nurses who have to resuscitate and stabilize them before they're transported.

I'm sure it's quite similar for unstable big people, too.