Published Apr 7, 2002
You are reading page 3 of Funny/Not so funny experiences with OB Doctors and ancillar personnell....
I have to tell one of my "I can't believe I did that" stories: This happened almost 20 years ago--
My pt. was quite numb from her epidural and could not get a good sense of her u/cs in order to push (long before the practice of "laboring down"). I put my hand on the fundus so I could tell her when the u/c was starting. I would help her push then resume charting ...always keeping one hand her belly. She tells me she thinks she's contracting; I (in all my wisdom) tell her she is not. She proceeds to tell me otherwise.... I finally focus my full attention on her and not the chart.....only to find my hand on her breast!
Of course I was mortified... and apologized. My pt. actually laughed at me.
One more situation:
I go into my pts room and she is sitting on the edge of her bed with a look of anger on her face that could have melted my shoes.
She was diabetic and 20 weeks pregnant with us for blood glucose stabilization. The doc had just rounded.
I asked her what was wrong and she goes "Dr. ---- and I have a difference of religion! He thinks he's GOD and I DON'T!"
Laugh today...it feels good. :)
NurseNora, BSN, RN
I've also done the uterine palpation on the breast thing. Very embarassing. But the worst one was when we first started letting the mother hold the infant in the delivery room. We were to put the baby skin to skin with the mother, which I did. When the doctor was finished with the repair (this was when everyone got an episiotomy) I tried to pick up the baby so we could move the mother into her bed. The baby didn't move. I got a better grip on the baby, pulled and again, nothing happened. So I got an even better grip and pulled really hard. The patient finally said, "You've go a hold of my nipple."
The story about the doc's butt crack reminded me of an incident a couple of years ago. Doc checking patient who claimed she was "leaking fluid". We were in a tiny treatment room, he takes the speculum out and it is full of fresh, liquified semen and SPLAT ! on the floor. He immediately bent over to wipe it up which was a surprise in itself. With the room being so tiny, I was trapped in a corner behind him and when I looked down, all I could see was a 6 inch slice of his crack........he took forever to wipe up the slime and somehow I could not look away from the crack !! I could feel my stomach start to lurch and honestly......I don't know what made me sicker........the glob of semen on the floor or the sight of his hairy crack !!!! We still laugh about it on the floor.......everybody makes me tell new nurses the story.
[i have no idea what she said to the family after I left, but she apologized to me when she came out. When I went back in the family commented that that was the first time she had shut her mouth all day.
This was GREAT!
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