Friends

[Luckyone13]

I work in long term care. I have become friends with a resident who is 15 years my senior. I am happily married and my husband has no issue with this friendship. I am always an hour early for work. I was outside drinking coffee and this resident came out. He enjoyed our conversation and it gave him an hour of "normalcy". we now have coffee in the morning before I start my shift. We are not in his room. We are outside of the building where anyone can see. He looks forward to our coffee time. Our conversation has NEVER been inappropriate or crossed the line. Is there anything wrong with giving this man his time of normalcy? He has no family to speak of and has befriended a few of us. We have become his support system and friend.

[Mind spirit body heal the triad]

I am going to go against most of what is being said and say that I see nothing wrong with it not only is it purely friendship, but you are off the clock so it's not like you were spending too much time on the clock with one resident, and I believe written order for someone to have good quality of life but you should heal in all departments not just with medicines if they're lonely they give them a friend. I do agree that you should make time for all residents the same and treat them all the same to an extent. Meaning if someone were to come along another Resident or even fellow co-worker and join in on the coffee break before work then by all means allow it that's just chance for more friendship and less loneliness for that man or anyone else or other residents that would join in. And one more note on that I tried to treat all of my residents the same and give them all proper care and go the extra mile for all of them but if you have extra time and you want to give a little bit of extra attention to a resident that has no one I see absolutely no problem with that. I was taught in school as well as my whole life growing up did I show kindness and if I can help someone deal with their day a little bit better then do it. Honestly I think you should be commended. It sounds like you could truly be one of those nurses that's not afraid to go the extra mile no matter how much extra it may add to her work shift. This world needs more nurses that are willing to sit down and no a patient / resident. Not only is it beneficial to their emotional but also their physical. If they feel like they have a friend or they have someone even if it is just a friendship then it gives them determination to do what they need to do to stick around and stay healthy a little bit longer. It also makes taking care of them a little easier. If you know president is a person and not only as a chart on your desk, Ben if something's going wrong you're going to notice it a whole lot easier than somebody who doesn't know them if something's off you will see it. That is why I continue to be friends with all of my residence. Unfortunately I don't always have time to give every one of them the same attention in the same day. This is why I tried to on my free time pick a couple of them give him a little bit of attention extra that day talk to him see how their weeks been going see if they need anything see how they're feeling, and then the following day when I have extra time I find a few different residents to do this with. So I can mend you for being not just a nurse that passes meds and sits at her desk, but for being a nurse that I would feel comfortable with taking care of my own close relatives because she's caring and she would know if something was off and be able to catch it and I would feel comfortable knowing that my family was in good hands with a nurse like that. And I apologize for the ramblings but I was just trying to let you know how I feel so that you could understand as well as people who don't want to go that extra mile and maybe they might change. So you have a good day, and enjoy your chat with your resident friend and patient. Because you can do both especially out in the open like you're doing it.

[docmomruns, ADN, BSN, MSN, PhD]

This crosses a boundary. You shouldn't have a dual relationship with a patient, meaning it is unethical to be both friend and nurse. You need to excuse yourself from one or the other. Professional relationships are for the benefit of the patient, not the nurse. You are obviously getting something out of it or you wouldn't devote an hour out of each day for this person. You also might want to ask yourself why a patient is unable to form a bond with others and work to help him in that direction instead of fostering a sense of support from only you.