failing nursing school

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So, early in the semester I had a job that was working me 6 days a week paying no mind to nursing school. We were short on workers so I accepted the distress that they were giving me and kept forward. Our first of exams we had two exams. One was monday, and one tuesday. They do their best in my program to avoid that. They did a great job, just that first week hurt me. Well I finally told my work I didn't want to work Monday's or Tuesday's. They did that for me. I was starting to improve but it wasn't enough. My program is really fast and strict. The passing grade is an 80. That is a B. Pretty tough standards I think. Well the last test I didn't make the grade I needed. I was 6 points too shy. So I went ahead and prepared myself that I could fail. I'm okay with it. I'm going to work while I'm out of school until next year and then quit my job in December. I guess I wanted to vent but my question is... How do you get over the fact that you won't graduate with your class? I know a couple of other girls in my class in the same boat. It makes me feel a little bit better but not quite enough that I won't cry the day of my final. I look at my two best friends I have known for 2 years and see bright nurses. I'd be fine if it wasn't for my work!! And that pi$$%$ me off more than anything! I don't want to blame my work but I remember taking that exam Monday making a low score and then studying but a few hours because I was exhausted after work and failing that exam too bad on Tuesday. At least I have brought all of my other classes up but I just can't grasp the thought of passing this one... So do I just keep forward and not look back? Do I resent my old job till the day I die? I want to be a nurse with every bone, muscle, and drop of blood coursing through my body. I see people passing with flying colors that hardly have a good attitude. I see people cheating next to me during little exams because they don't want to retake it? How come those are the people that pass and I fail? The person who studies hours on hours? Hope to see input, thanks for reading my book.

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Specializes in Emergency Department.

While it's good to rant about things from time to time, you should call it quits and leave your pity party. It does you no good to do that to yourself. How do you get over not graduating with your class? It helps to already be in a class so that you know you'll be behind them for certain. Of my original cohort, I have kept up with only a couple of people and they're doing well. I integrated myself into my new cohort and found that I was welcomed into the group and that cohort was very close and still is. The main thing is that you're there for yourself, not for them.

You do what you need to do so that you can progress through each term and ultimately graduate.

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Specializes in Pediatrics, Emergency, Trauma.

We all run our own races.

About 14 years ago, I failed an ADN program. I dusted myself off, kept competing my pre-req's while working as a nursing assistant, within 4 years removed from failure I went through a Practical Nursing program, passed and became licensed as a LPN, kept plugging and within 5 years working as a LPN, was accepted in a BSN program, passed and became licensed as an RN.

It took me 12 years, what helped was understanding that my own destiny is in my hands and doing the work to be successful, no matter how long; you have the power to do that as well-find out what your options are, regroup and try again with an action plan that is in YOUR best interests.

Best wishes.

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You are right I have been playing a pity party like no other. I have realized I have done that. I don't know why I continue to hope that someone will feel sorry for me. My friends are extremely supportive and as I think it's almost as though I shoot them down. Every time they tell me to stop talking about failure I grin and say it's true. I am basically pushing away the people that are supporting me. I do it because I have never held friends well. Maybe this is my way of pushing them away now so I don't have to deal with it later? I don't know. Either way I plan to go back. I just fear I will be depressed or something. My advisor said that most students that fail always come back and make all As in further classes. As though they got a wake-up call. I told her a month ago I had got my wake-up call. I kind of think I got a wake-up nudge and I kept sleeping. I think I am burnt out and upset. It is a little too much for me right now. I am going to keep strong. Thank you for your post.

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Specializes in Emergency Department.
You are right I have been playing a pity party like no other. I have realized I have done that. I don't know why I continue to hope that someone will feel sorry for me. My friends are extremely supportive and as I think it's almost as though I shoot them down. Every time they tell me to stop talking about failure I grin and say it's true. I am basically pushing away the people that are supporting me. I do it because I have never held friends well. Maybe this is my way of pushing them away now so I don't have to deal with it later? I don't know. Either way I plan to go back. I just fear I will be depressed or something. My advisor said that most students that fail always come back and make all As in further classes. As though they got a wake-up call. I told her a month ago I had got my wake-up call. I kind of think I got a wake-up nudge and I kept sleeping. I think I am burnt out and upset. It is a little too much for me right now. I am going to keep strong. Thank you for your post.

People do feel sorry for you when you relate your stories of woe, but most of them know they still have to live their own lives. Because they have their own lives and their own priorities, they may not be able to do something to help you. I suspect that your friends are being supportive because they can see that you have the ability to do this and they want you to succeed at this.

You need to not only realize that it's up to you to change your attitude, you need to stop the pity party cycle because it's always a party of one. Stop thinking of failure and the impossible, and every time you have those thoughts, change it around to succeeding and the possible.

You should use the time you have off from school to reflect on your own attitude and on your previous time in school. You've seen a lot of "stuff" and the next time through, you should do a lot better because you've had a second crack at being able to truly absorb the material. Working that much doesn't usually do anybody any favors, having good to excellent time management skills minimizes the impact that it does have on you.

Even though you're getting ready to quit work, you need to work on developing your time management and study skills so that you're as efficient as you need to be at this. It's because something will always be there to chew up the time you have to study.

Lastly, don't push your friends away. You only need to separate from them if the relationship itself becomes toxic or you need to move away. Your current friends that are moving on, let them move on, but if they choose to continue to associate with you, let them! You can, and will, make new friends with other classmates when you return to school and become part of a new cohort.

First, though, dispense with the Pity Party, change that attitude around, and learn to say "no" to things and people that monopolize your time. You started to do that with work when you said you can no longer work those days. If there's one thing I've learned about "pleaser" personalities, is that often they get treated like a doormat because they allow it and they don't usually realize why until they realize that it's the "pleaser" in them that causes it and once they learn to confidently say "no" to things, they often suddenly find that they're no longer the doormat, whether it be at work or in their personal lives.

Lastly, embrace those that choose to be your friend. It's OK to tell them that life sucks right now, but then use them to help you plan a strategy to change that. Once you start looking at the positive side of things as a habit, you'll see that quitting no longer bothers you.

Yes, I failed out of school and it woke me up to certain aspects of what I was doing at that time that I could have done better. Guess what? I did do better the second time around and I graduated with Honors, even though I still had no option but to work full time through school.

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After one year, I was in contact with absolutely no one from my class. Graduating with your class should not be your concern. You need to be concerned about graduating at all. Many people get booted, never to return; you need to do your best to insure that you get it together, so you are not a member of that group. Now that would be something to be depressed about! Get together with your instructors to get as much as you can from the situation now. Find out what you can do to succeed. Show them that you are eager to remedy the situation, right now. There is no time like the present to fix what you need to fix. Good luck.

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AkulahawkRN, first I want to say thank you. I guess looking at the big picture I never truly accepted failing. I haven't failed yet. But I'm ready to fail and that's okay. That's not me pity partying either hahah. I was talking to one of my best friends today, and yes when I say friends I meant best friends. I told her what if I do pass by the hair on my chin? Will I really know what I need to know to succeed in med/surg? She admitted that I likely would need to study my Pathophysiology to truly pass med/surg. So I thought instead of taking a break if I fail. I mean I'll be working but I'll get a break from school. I am going to go ahead and buy the med/surg textbook. I'm going to get the syllabus and go ahead and start studying that material along with my Pathophysiology. I have a lot to learn before I become a nurse. I have the caring and compassion down but the truth is I want to know how to save someone's life. I want to know what the different terms like rhonchi, thrills, tachycardia, and hypertension mean. I know what they mean but what do they look/sound like? What signs of distress should I look for? I want to be a good nurse. I want to be the best nurse. I want to know what I am looking for and if I see it what do I do. I can't do that if I skim by each semester by the hair on my chin. My time management does suck. It sucks soooo bad. I don't even know where to start to make it better. I know I spend too much time on the computer but everything I need is on the computer. That is what kills me I think.

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Specializes in Emergency Department.

Having good self discipline is a step toward managing your time. If the computer is a distraction, then you just have to work on dividing your time between study and fun. It's all up to you.

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