So I am going to try to make this as short as possible. So the first time I went into nursing school it was a 1 year LPN program. I got through second semester and failed on finals day by 5 points! The instructors were really supportive towards the end and were hoping I would have passed as earlier in the year I had some performance anxiety issues with the skills test outs that I got solved with some help from my doctor.
I ended up going to school again at another school this time for a 2 year LPN program. I got to 3rd semester. I had all of my classes at a passing grade. Clinical (and S or U grade ) seemed to be the issue at this point. I was very anxious and went to my adviser asking if i should be concerned about it she said no as she had not heard anything herself. I even emailed my clinical instructor for updates on my progress with no response and about the middle of the clinical time I went to my instructor and she said I was doing fine. Just because I saw something "bad" on the eval didn't mean it was bad it just meant to improve on it. That eased my anxiety for the time being but I could still feel her vibe was off with me for the rest of the semester. At the end for the test out simulation after it was over I got pulled aside saying that they may not pass me. This wasn't my clinical instructor telling me this this was another one. I said why and she told me well some students just have to wait until the end. (the funny thing is this instructor only watched my simulation) They pulled i'm into a meeting with the entire faculty and explained why they may not pass me....now at this point i'm thinking why couldn't the instructor tell me this via email or ask me to come in since I was sending her emails? Their conclusion was at one of the clinical sights I did get enough med surge experience so they extended my clinical time by 2 weeks. Still had me do all the paperwork involved but it was not graded. I ended up getting kicked out of the program because I accidentally took a piece of paper home with a pt last name on it. Even though I was honest and gave it to the instructor the next morning and said it was at the bottom of my bag and I didn't realize it until then they still dismissed me as this was a "HIPPA violation."
In the mean time I got diagnosed with ADD/migraines. This would explain the little mistakes I made at clinical/ lack of focus I did have. So I reapplied to the program. They told me specifically if I reapplied I would start out with a "clean slate". I got in and they made me write out a contract with them with all of these regulations saying I had to meet with the didactic instructor, clinical instructor, tutor, on campus counselor, and disability coordinator. I met with the disability coordinator on my own and counselor along with my therapists. I had a 94.7% in the didactic class. During clinical this time around I screwed up by not recalling a skill fully (i told the instructor before hand this was my first time doing this ever and it has been over a year since we practiced this) and asked for assistance in the pt room...apparently that was the wrong thing to do (the first nursing program I was in allowed this however). Also I made the mistake of letting family help ambulate the patient....granted I honestly thought that would be fine since the pt was able to walk mostly on her own. As a result I got pulled into a meeting with the department chair, didactic, and clinical instructor. They told me basically I was failing clinical after week 2, I needed an adjustment on my meds, they had doubts I could push the code button if I ever saw a pt code, it was over 2 weeks per contract that i saw the tutor (even though i asked about this in another meeting with the instructor) I was going to see her that day, and they were mad I took long to re apply into the program even though I did it before the deadline (yet they could give me less than 24 hour notice for the orientation schedule). They also said I never contacted the disability coordinator. I said I had papers from her in my car I got a response "yeah, okay." Turns out the coordinator made a mistake and thought I only emailed her and that's what she told the instructors. As she went to look back in her papers she realized I did actually see her in her office even before the contract was created. I never got an apology for this from the nursing department for this. At that point they made me go to the counselor on campus immediately. I talked to my psychologist about it and she said It shouldn't have gone down that way, they discriminated, and it sounds like they had their minds made up before I even walked in there for the second time. Also my dad ended up calling them and they brought up the HIPPA violation (which my therapist also said technically wasn't one) from the semester before. That to me says so much for a "clean slate" start.
I went to the dean with an email time line of ones that were never responded to or took more than 24 hours as that is policy for the program, also what was said in the meetings, and what happened last semester. All he could say was it sounds like there was a communication issue between the instructors and he will talk to them. I have also thought about suing for discrimination but then thought its not worth my time and they will do this to someone else eventually that will.
I want to go back to nursing school again and face all the fears as I feel that now I have a diagnosis there are ways to find to adapt and do even better. Also any thoughts on the story would be appreciated.
