End Stage of CHF for my dad?

[emptyboxcars]

This may be too difficult to say what stage he's in, but this is about all I know. My father and his wife have no desire to see the doctor often or know a prognosis. He is on oxygen full time and has been for a couple years. He's on coumadin and a number of other meds (won't really share with me the specifics). He has had two heart attacks and went to the docotr each time a full 24 hours after the heart attack. His last heart attack took place about 6 years ago and was diagnosed with congestive heart failure then. He is 77 years old.

At this point, he has liver damage, kidney damage, edema, dyspnea, nausea (from meds) and rests a fair amount throughout the day. I live out of state, but he sounds somewhat breathless on the phone these days and his memory is failing. He repeats himself now, not realizing he's already said something (no dementia/Alzheimer's, but from limited oxygen supply). He has told me he bruises very easily. He says that just squeezing him too tightly will cause bruising. He also started having some kind of ovewhelming infection in his gums (says it's due to low oxygen circulation) and they ended up doing surgery adn pulling all of his teeth. Now, however, he can't wear dentures because they've had a difficult time stopping hte bleeding in his mouth and every time he puts the dentures in it's simply too painful and makes him bleed. So, on top of hte nausea, he's stuck with a soft foods diet. This has not helped him emotionally/mentally nor physically. He hardly eats anything anymore. A year and a half ago when I visited him and he had his teeth, he ate 3 potato chips for the whole day. Now, as I understand it, he eats even less if that's possible. Despite this, overall, his mood is chipper, but he definitely is struggling with depression over having lost all his teeth and being in so much pain, etc.

I'm just wanting to prepare myself and find out if he's in the end stage. I tend to think he is, but it's just so hard to know since they go to the doctor as little as possible.

Is there any way you can tell me based on this info.? I know for sure it's either Stage three or four, but I just would like to prepare myself emotionally if he's nearing the end. I hate being so far away and knowing that I might not make it to see him before he dies.

Also, how do they typically die and might there be enough time for me to fly out there (6.5 hr flight)?

THank you.

[annacnatorn]

Emptyboxcars,

I would get some time off from work and take a trip to go visit your Dad.

We can't give any medical advise, but the one thing we can give you is the advice to get on a plane and go see your Father.

Why wait? Don't Hesitate.

[leslie :-D]

Emptyboxcars,

I would get some time off from work and take a trip to go visit your Dad.

We can't give any medical advise, but the one thing we can give you is the advice to get on a plane and go see your Father.

Why wait? Don't Hesitate.

that's wonderful advice, anna.

no, there is no way of knowing how close he is to the end.

if he's the type that doesn't want to know, then i'm guessing he'd reject the idea of hospice services.

i very much agree with annacnatorn.

no time like the present, to pay him a visit.

that would be more of my priority, versus waiting until he is dying.

wishing you both much strength and peace.

leslie

[emptyboxcars]

Yes, I have a trip booked to go out in a couple weeks. Just trying to prepare myself for what I'll be seeing when I see him. I hate not knowing a time-frame for him to prepare myself emotionally. Thanks for reading my post and responding to it.