Enablement Overload

Yep, this. I talk to all my kids about focusing their thoughts on something other than the headache/belly ache/sore throat.. Like their school work. 9x out of 10, I don't see them back these days. I also have been setting clear limits - "if your belly is still hurting after lunch, come back BEFORE recess." for example. If they come immediately after recess, then it becomes an avoidance discussion. But like I said, most kids feel better by lunch and I don't see them again. Works like a charm!

I just had a 14 year old come for a small scratch... "it burns" Just clean it with soap and water and it's fine.

I honestly don't think I even knew where the nurse's office was when I was in school..

Me, either.

There's a lot of talk about teaching and encouraging resilience in the school setting. Maybe they're reading our minds?

Yep, this. I talk to all my kids about focusing their thoughts on something other than the headache/belly ache/sore throat.. Like their school work. 9x out of 10, I don't see them back these days. I also have been setting clear limits - "if your belly is still hurting after lunch, come back BEFORE recess." for example. If they come immediately after recess, then it becomes an avoidance discussion. But like I said, most kids feel better by lunch and I don't see them again. Works like a charm!

I don't tell them when to come back. But, I hope it is after recess, so I can ask them what they did at recess. This. Tells me how they are really feeling.

I don't tell them when to come back. But, I hope it is after recess, so I can ask them what they did at recess. This. Tells me how they are really feeling.

I have the ability to observe recess. Love that benefit.

I never tell them to come back explicitly... I tell them when they are allowed to come back. I never want to see kids back unless they have something I want to recheck. I can't see the kids at recess, so I have no idea if them telling me they were yakking in the bushes is true or not. And even so, if you are well enough to be sitting outside, you are well enough to sit at your desk.

Ever consider its an abused or beaten or bullied child using the easiest excuse they can think of to come to what they perceive as a safe place with someone who wont judge them and is supposed to care?

These arent small adults who throw tantrums over Starbucks cups not being Christmasy enough. They are vulnerable children and the bellyache you seem to be so quick to dismiss maybe from being punched by a drunk parent the night before.

Having been one of those abused kids, who never opened up to anyone because everyone always seemed to busy, I'd suggest maybe not being so quick to judge and taking the time to make sure there isnt an underlying condition.

I mean if the worst part of your day is a kid faking a tummy ache, its a pretty good day in the grand scheme of things.

Ever consider its an abused or beaten or bullied child using the easiest excuse they can think of to come to what they perceive as a safe place with someone who wont judge them and is supposed to care?

These arent small adults who throw tantrums over Starbucks cups not being Christmasy enough. They are vulnerable children and the bellyache you seem to be so quick to dismiss maybe from being punched by a drunk parent the night before.

Having been one of those abused kids, who never opened up to anyone because everyone always seemed to busy, I'd suggest maybe not being so quick to judge and taking the time to make sure there isnt an underlying condition.

I mean if the worst part of your day is a kid faking a tummy ache, its a pretty good day in the grand scheme of things.

For a very small minority of kiddos, yes that might be the case. Unfortunately, they may not get the attention they need because the health office is gummed up with snowflakes who have learned the magic words to get out of doing something they don't like.

Also, it's amazing how often this need coincides with math or English class, as opposed to other times of the day...

Ever consider its an abused or beaten or bullied child using the easiest excuse they can think of to come to what they perceive as a safe place with someone who wont judge them and is supposed to care?

These arent small adults who throw tantrums over Starbucks cups not being Christmasy enough. They are vulnerable children and the bellyache you seem to be so quick to dismiss maybe from being punched by a drunk parent the night before.

Having been one of those abused kids, who never opened up to anyone because everyone always seemed to busy, I'd suggest maybe not being so quick to judge and taking the time to make sure there isnt an underlying condition.

I mean if the worst part of your day is a kid faking a tummy ache, its a pretty good day in the grand scheme of things.

Most of us who are long in the tooth as school nurses, sadly, have come across the child you describe. That is not our run of the mill visitor. That is not the child that runs around until they are out of breath at recess and then decides at reading the NOW they have a stomach ache. Every single day. Yes, we are aware that the stomach ache that the kids come in with when we see then frequently during a certain class are most likely due to difficulty with that subject, or missing homework, or yes on occasion due to a misarable home life that spills over into school. Trust me when I tell you that I have dialed CPS so many times at this point in my career that I no longer need to look up the number. I no longer need to listen through the prompts and I already know the questions they're going to ask me so when a child comes in with a complaint that could generate a call, I already know what follow up questions to askor how to steer the conversation to answer the questions that I will eventually be asked. So don't think for a second that the idea of an abused child is never far off my radar.