Discouraged
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Hi- I'm new to this forum. I have not had the best luck with my nursing career. I'm 45 and graduated 8 years ago. My first job was in the newborn nursery and lasted 6 months, with me having a baby in the middle of that. The dept was in turmoil with high turnover and a mediation team that met with us weekly to figure out the problems. I was miserable and never felt like I caught on and was competant.
I went then to a nursing home thinking it would be easier and boy was I wrong. I was the most educated person in the building after 5pm and had no management skills. The aids and kitchen staff were always off smoking and I couldn't keep track of them and give patient care also. During my 6 months there I had another nurse (on MY med-pass night) over drug my patient "to keep them quiet" and then tell me how to chart it so it would look OK, even though it was not the orders. I had several instances of unethical and illegal activity and was being called in by the state investigators regularly though it had nothing to do with my behavior.
I think I had post-partum depression and I know I was sleep-deprived. And the stress of being in a place where the care was so poor was overwhelming.
I took a few months off and then landed in private duty peds where I have been for 7 yrs. I've been successful at this but I'm bored and tired of being in people's homes. But my confidence was crushed by those first 2 jobs being so awful and feeling like I just wasn't capable of being a "real" nurse. I'm questioning my abilities.
Are there other threads you can refer me to where others like myself have struggled to figure out where they fit in in the nursing world or if they want to be a nurse at all. And is there a resource that lists all the different possible jobs nurses do?
I sure would appreciate any input you have.