Discouraged from becoming and NP because I hate critical care

[koster22]

I have been a BSN RN for about a year and a half. I took a job in pediatric CVICU right out of school. After staying for almost a year, I left because I was completely miserable. I am very detail oriented, and though adult ICU intimidated me in school, I was a good student. I truly was open and ready to learn and dive completely into pediatric critical care. The feeling of knowing I had done everything "right" all day long, only to lose a patient despite my efforts was just something I just could never compartmentalize. I would go home and agonize over every decision, praying I would not have a patient as critical the next day. Despite encouragement and support from peers and a director who constantly told me she felt like I was meant to be an ICU nurse, my constant anxiety told me it wasn't right. I left and started working in a Well Baby Nursery and really love it. You could say it is "mindless" compared to the tasks I had to perform and knowledge I was required to maintain in ICU, but I love the babies and I love educating parents. It is an area where a LOT of education is needed, especially among new parents and I feel like I am good at it. While boring at times, I really feel like I am the kind nurse I always wanted to be working with "well" patients. I am caring, kind, and feel valuable.

However, I always imagined myself in a pediatric primary care setting and lately find myself dreaming of going back to school for FNP or PNP. I knew leaving critical care meant that I would also be leaving behind an orificenal of skills and knowledge that would not maintain itself in a less acute setting.

I would love the advice of the NPs who work in the primary care/clinic setting. Did you work in critical care and love it before going to school for NP? Are there any NPs out there that hated critical care and flourished in NP school? Thank you!

[adventure780, BSN, MSN, RN, APN]

I agree you should be passionate and love which ever route you take in your career, if you don't like it and dread going to class or work, it's not for you

[eCCU]

Have you thought of working in med surg pedi or adult? Its probably the best place if you are considering PNP or FNP plus the patients are more stable you do not have to stress when you leave work :-)