Devastated

Mona Mona, BSN, RN · Dec 9, 2005

Wow! I'm so sorry this happened! I have no good advice....because that is so shady and scary to me. I am only taking pre-requisites now, and not even in school yet....but these are the kinds of stories that bother me about nursing. Be all you can be, nice, etc., and things STILL go wrong. That is crazy.

Can you call another meeting with her, and specifically ask about the incidents, and at least be able to respond to those incidents? So she has your side of things?

And, say that you want to keep your job, so you are willing to work with her. If another incident happens, can she tell you RIGHT THEN, so you can share your side of the story?

That is shady to tell someone 5 weeks later....or however much later. I would be worried if she doesn't even want to try to address these concerns with you. I mean, you are MORE than meeting her half way. I would be suspicious of ANY work place that would rather fire someone than even try to work with them, know what I mean?

I hope it all works out for you. The only good thing I can think of is that if it's not meant to be, then it's not meant to be, and maybe this would just make you find a better place to work, where your patients skills are more appreciated, rather than which "clique" likes you or not, ya know?

:icon_hug:

jessnurse05 · Dec 9, 2005

Hi,

I'm also new to nursing and had a similar experience. My first evaluation was bad and they kept mentioning me missing meds and making med errors when I knew that I hadn't. I came out of the evaluation in tears becuase I didn't realize anything was wrong. I finally linked it to one time when I was working with a nurse who was not my regular preceptor and I had trouble with an IV dressing change that caused a med to be late. It wasn't a big deal and I fixed the problem. She had been floated to peds (where I worked) and wasn't familiar with the procedures so she had me doing a lot of unnecessary med checks with her and she was nitpicky about everything I did. I think a lot of my bad evaluation came from that one nurse in particular.

Anyway, what I did and my advice to you is, if you have a preceptor or a mentor who you are working with, have a talk with them. Or like the other poster said, try to find out who the nurses were and talk to them. That is what I did and we both learned that we just weren't communicating. I had been teasing her about how she sits around all day while I do all the work, and she thought I was serious. I've always been a little sarcastic and I thought she understood that I would never say something like that and be serious, but she thought I was. There were other things but this one sticks with me because I made her feel bad when I really didn't mean to. The stuff that happened with that other nurse with me was most likely because she didn't know what level I was at. She might have thought I was lazy or the term that they used in my eval was "lacks initiative" since I needed her help with so many IV things. I was just worried about losing the IV on a kid since I had never worked peds before. After figuring things out with my preceptor, it got a lot better for me.

I hope this helps you and that your evals improve.

((((HUGS))))

Jessica

SaderNurse05, BSN, RN · Dec 10, 2005

I have been a supervisor (albeit not in nursing) and I would NEVER let 5 weeks go by or have complaints from 5 staff members without investigating it with the employee. I would be leery of a supervisor who would present any problem to me for the first time in an evaluation situation. There may be a better place for you, or it may work out here, but so far I am not impressed with the supervisor's skills....

ZASHAGALKA, RN · Dec 10, 2005

Poor manager there.

A good manager doesn't let someone gossip about a co-worker and then turn the gossip back onto that co-worker.

If someone comes to a manager w/ a problem the manager should, if possible, redirect them to that person to settle the issue, AND keep tabs on the issue to ensure that it is settled.

Dumping unaddressed observations on you at evaluation proves a poorer evaluation of your boss than it does you.

~faith,

Timothy.

DLS_PMHNP, MSN, RN, NP · Dec 10, 2005

If there were specific performance issues and/or complaints from your fellow co-workers, your DON should have brought these to your attention immediately, and not waited for your first performance review. She should have also given you SPECIFIC examples of what the complaints were.

That is bad management on her part.

Best wishes! I hope things improve for you soon :icon_wink

jessnurse05 · Dec 10, 2005

Wow,

Like I said before I had the same thing done to me. I was doing bad and no one told me until after 5 weeks. Then about another month to 6 weeks went by before my managers met with me again and let me know that they didn't think I was a good fit for pediatrics and said they wanted to transfer me to the medical floor. I agreed with their decision and the reasons why (just plain lack of education in peds from my nursing school), but I felt like I had the rug pulled out from under me cuz everyone treated my like I was doing great and everything was good until the manager would come and ask me if I had a couple minutes to talk in her office. I didn't know that being treated like that isn't normal.

Thanks for the advice.

Jessica

Bipley · Dec 10, 2005

I'm a new LPN, and just started a new job in a LTC facility. I really loved it, have a great relationship with both my residents and the CNAs that work with me. I thought I was doing a good job.
I just recently got my first evaluation (I've been there 5 weeks), and things did NOT go well. The DON told me that 5 of her most reliable nurses have complained about me being rude to them. I remember one instance where I told another nurse to back off because he was really being demeaning to me, but other than that I truly have no idea where this is coming from. She told me that even though the residents there love me, if I don't straighten up my act, she will have to fire me. ME?! I mean, I know that getting along with co-workers is important, I truly do. But, whether people like me or not is of little concern to me. I just want to make sure my residents are cared for to the best of my ability. I'm just devastated. I've always prided myself on being courteous and genuine with people. Any advice for the new girl with the bad rep?
Blessings,
Crystal

By any chance, do you happen to have a dry sense of humor? If you do, there is your problem. I've been in your shoes and when I explained that my sense of humor can be martini dry, then all was well. Sometimes those who do not share your particular sense of humor really, truely, honestly feel you are not being sweet and nice. When you are upfront and honest and explain yourself from a verrrry sincere point of view, people are fine with that. People can handle honesty. It's the covering up kinda BS that they don't deal with.

I'm not saying this is you, I'm just throwing out thoughts.

HisHands, ASN, RN · Dec 11, 2005

Well, after my evaluation, I confronted the other nurse I had, memorably, been rude to, and he acted like he had no idea what i was talking about!!

I think my biggest problem with this whole situation is that no issue was ever brought up to me regarding my performance. I was lead to believe I was a good, competent nurse. So, that's why it hurt so much. 5 weeks later hearing about all of the things I did wrong. When my DON started ripping into me, I asked her if there maybe was a better place to talk about this, and if it really needed to be put off until my evaluation. She told me that this is what the evaluations are for, and that it would have been inappropriate to bring it up at another time! :angryfire :angryfire Anyway, I'm just going to watch what I say, and continue to focus on the residents well being. I just really like my job, and I don't want to leave. But, at the same time I don't want to wonder every day if today is the day I'll be let go.

Wha's a girl to do?

Crystal

HappyJaxRN · Dec 11, 2005

Isn't that tragic? I know what you're talking about. I feel the same way. I'm not really there (at work) to make friends...I'm there to do my job. I'm too realizing that in order to stay aboard, I have to be political with everyone else....or in their eyes, be a team player. I thought a team player meant that I jump in and help when others need it or when someone is headed to the unit...jump in....or whatever...not partaking in the bonding and cliques of the floor. I'm not cliquey....Maybe we need to be to survive...

Sounds to me like your co-workers are trying to control you....and they're mad that they can't. Or maybe they are not used to working with someone who is sure of themself. Sounds like you are grounded and confident. Maybe they're not used to that and it intimidates them.

I only say this, because I felt this way when I first started. I got beaten down pretty quick. :angryfire

HappyJaxRN · Dec 11, 2005

By any chance, do you happen to have a dry sense of humor? If you do, there is your problem. I've been in your shoes and when I explained that my sense of humor can be martini dry, then all was well. Sometimes those who do not share your particular sense of humor really, truely, honestly feel you are not being sweet and nice. When you are upfront and honest and explain yourself from a verrrry sincere point of view, people are fine with that. People can handle honesty. It's the covering up kinda BS that they don't deal with.
I'm not saying this is you, I'm just throwing out thoughts.

Ah...that explains it...I have a dry personality...A lot of people can't peg when I'm joking 1/2 the time and it really upsets them. He he...oops.

I don't cover up any BS tho...Unfortunately, if there's any, I'll be one of the ones to say something about it. There ya go...not a team player ...just figured out my problem...Maybe I need to just grab my charts and sit in the corner away from everyone...staying out of trouble... :coollook:

A co-worker walked over to me the last time I worked and said, "Gee, you're being quiet today."

My answer to her? "Well, I figured that if I didn't say anything, I would stay out of trouble since I seem to be the one stirring it up lately."

Party on! Thanks for this string...I can see where I stand out...and guess I always will....:balloons: :balloons: