Longtime lurker, first time poster. I've had a rough week and am unsure of what to do with this situation; I'm hoping to vent and get some advice.
My cohort is in the 4th semester of a 5 semester program. This is our pediatrics rotation and we have to do a large research project/presentation for our class that we will later present again for the entire school at the end of the semester. We did our class presentations last week. I worked with someone who I will call Kay, and someone I will call Justin.
Justin has struggled throughout the program. He is often late, leaves for extended periods during lecture, and still seems to be lost on basic concepts. Up until this point, I thought he was just a bad student and felt bad for him. I worked with him on a project last semester and his portion was very poorly written and seemed to have little effort behind it. When he asked me this semester if we could work together again, I said I would have to talk to Kay. By the time I brought it up to Kay, however, he had asked her and she said yes. Since he waited so long, Kay and I had already done the research. We asked him to supply the art materials, help with the poster, and read risk factors and statistics during the presentation.
Which leads us to our presentation, which was on child maltreatment. Again, all Justin had to do was talk about risk factors and stats which were on the board and we would do the rest. Instead, he went on a rambling diatribe about how sometimes kids deserve to be hit, how his neighbor has an unfair CPS case against her for beating her 9 year old for "looking at Mediaographies," CPS stats are wrong, all this weird and horrible stuff I wish I was making up. Kay was at a loss and everyone in our class was shocked and mumbling. I have a background in social work and have worked with CPS, so I diverted him and explained these concepts to him best I could on the spot (we had a lecture on child abuse earlier that day, during which he got up and left). At one point he said something like "well I guess we're just supposed to talk to children, apparently" and laughed, which made everyone in our class laugh uncomfortably. And I said to him "This is not ******* funny." He finally shut up and we managed to finish our presentation.
I talked to my instructors and apologized profusely for that mess, including my swearing. They were very understanding and said Kay and I would not be penalized for Justin's behavior.
So...we have another, different group project later in the semester. I am not willing to work with him again. I asked around but everyone I texted had a group. Since I don't have everyone's number, I turned to our Facebook group. I thought he wouldn't possibly ask me to be his partner again. But of course, he did. I responded "No, sorry." I didn't think much of it but a classmate texted me and said I should reconsider having that exchange be public. By the time I deleted the post, a few people had "liked" my "No, sorry" response to his request.
In hindsight I should've told him privately that we would not work together again, but I have been fuming since our presentation and am scared of what I'll say to him in private. I'm terrified of drama. Our program is full of it and our cohort has been talked to about how negative we are. I have really tried to avoid it, and now I feel like I've walked right into it.
So as I mentioned before, Kay, Justin, and I have to give the same presentation to the entire school in April. I don't know how to approach this at all. Should I ask Justin not to participate? Ask my instructor to remove Justin from our group? I don't trust him at all after this fiasco. It wasn't just the nature of his comments, it was that he kept them to himself and then unloaded during our GRADED presentation. I don't know if it was sabotage, profound ignorance, or what.
My questions are basically: a) Was I in the wrong during any of this and do I owe Justin an apology and b) What should I do in regards to having to give the presentation later in the semester with him? Thank you for reading and sorry for all the rambling.
Specializes in Psychiatry, Community, Nurse Manager, hospice.
You were wrong to swear during the presentation, that was inappropriate. You've apologized and that's over and I think you realized that mistake, which is mitigated by the fact that your partner went off the rails.
You are not wrong for anything else you've done that you've shared here, including posting "No, sorry" on facebook. Nothing wrong with that.
As far as getting out of working with him again, I would ask for permission to do a presentation alone. This shows responsibility.
FolksBtrippin, BSN, RN
2,322 Posts
You were wrong to swear during the presentation, that was inappropriate. You've apologized and that's over and I think you realized that mistake, which is mitigated by the fact that your partner went off the rails.
You are not wrong for anything else you've done that you've shared here, including posting "No, sorry" on facebook. Nothing wrong with that.
As far as getting out of working with him again, I would ask for permission to do a presentation alone. This shows responsibility.