Dating Coworkers??

RNandRRT · Jun 5, 2009

I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt and then let them prove me wrong.

Accountability is definitely becoming a lost art. Being married to a co worker with kids, I can't imagine a scenario where both of us would have to be off other than for a death in immediate family. I truly believe you've been through this though, and think it sucks. They should be counseled for being sucky employees.

sissiesmama, ASN, RN · Jun 6, 2009

Seems like everyone has some good points. I had never really thought about it before, but have worked with people who were dating and co workers. I guess part of it had to do with their levels of maturity and how they handled themselves. I have seen some real "train wrecks" as far as that goes.

However, I met my dh at work when I was still in nursing school, in 1989. My hubbie was a nsg. supervisor at a local hospital, where I was working as a ward clerk on a med surg unit. We knew each other in passing, that kind of thing.

Years later, in 1999, we were both working on a med surg unit and got to be friends. After about 6 months or so, we started dating. We were quiet enough about it that when someone saw us out at dinner, they were thrown - they had no idea. When we got serious, I transferred down to the ER, and Brian accepted a job running a specialty hospital that was located physically inside our hospital, so we kind of still worked together then too.

In August, we will be celebrating our 5 year wedding anniversary, and for the last 2 years I have been able to be a stay at home mom to my 11 year old stepson who lives with us full time.

I'm happier than I have been in a long time, and plan on being a stay at home mom indefinetly. Loving every minute of it. If I do go back to work, I would like to maybe do something in the emergency aspect - maybe in the field as an EMT or something.

Anne

Lenee925 · Jun 6, 2009

Where I work now, we have two people who are apparently in love after cheating on both their spouses; subsequently moving in together shortly thereafter. That's not the worst. The guy's daughter works here and has to witness all the lunchtime jaunts to the local Motel 6. When he dumps her, (which he will because he has even propositioned me, almost prompting a sexual harassment issue) there will be even more drama than before to be reluctantly witnessed by all of us here.

HippyGreenPeaceChick · Jun 8, 2009

Where I work now, we have two people who are apparently in love after cheating on both their spouses; subsequently moving in together shortly thereafter. That's not the worst. The guy's daughter works here and has to witness all the lunchtime jaunts to the local Motel 6. When he dumps her, (which he will because he has even propositioned me, almost prompting a sexual harassment issue) there will be even more drama than before to be reluctantly witnessed by all of us here.

That all sounds so sad and fraught with potential for harm to all.

eriksoln, BSN, RN · Jun 8, 2009

Actually, the question you are bringing to the table is becoming more and more popular.

With the state of the economy, single people are forced to spend more and more time at work. A lot of people who I know personally are working two jobs, one FT the other PT or casual. This means more time at work, less time for being social. Witness the increase in internet dating and quick introduction services.

Work tends to take on an added significance in the person's life, and they socialize with co-workers more. Lunches, movies, card games, house warming parties, baby showers at one person's house or the others. All sorts of socializing going on that I didnt see before during my first two years of nursing.

The natural course is to get to know someone socially in a group such as these, then move on into considering dating when there is an attraction. I dont have a problem with it as long as you keep your stuff off the unit.

The problem though is, like I mentioned before, with the economy. Jobs are more scarce right now. Facilities are bolder/braver in setting down rules that they wouldnt have dreamed of a few years ago. If they find out you are dating someone, they may be on the lookout for a reason to fire you. They will have your replacement within a week, why not?

So, I think it is a personal choice. You have to decide for yourself if the risk is worth it.

For me, I met my current wife on the unit. I was a CNA at the time, she was an RN. She offered to let me move in with her during my last semester at school so I could work part time. The stipulation was that I get a CNA job on another unit or at another hospital. She/we didnt want to put on the "cloak and dagger" act anymore, it was too difficult. So, I moved in to her house and off the unit.