Could You Use A Snippet Of Humour, Today?

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it was entertainment night at the senior center .

claude the hypnotist exclaimed, "i'm here to put you into a trance. i intend to hypnotize each and every member of the audience."

the excitement was almost electric as claude withdrew a beautiful, antique pocket watch from his coat.

"i want you each to keep your eye on this antique watch. it's a very special watch.

it's been in my family for six generations." he began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting, "watch the watch,

watch the watch, watch the watch..."

the crowd became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth, light gleaming off its polished surface.

hundreds of pairs eyes followed the swaying watch until, suddenly, it slipped from the hypnotist's fingers and fell to the floor, breaking into a hundred pieces.

"$h!t!" said the hypnotist.

it took three days to clean up the senior center ..

claude was never invited back to entertain, ever again.

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Specializes in PACU, OR.

great one! i copied it and have already sent it halfway around the world :D

here's one from my inbox...

the other night i was invited out for a night with the 'girls.'

i told my husband that i would be home by midnight, 'i promise!'

well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easily.

around 3 a.m., a bit loaded, i headed for home.

just as i got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hallway started up and cuckooed 3 times.

quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, i cuckooed another 9 times..

i was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution, in order to escape a possible conflict with him. (even when totally smashed... 3 cuckoos plus 9 cuckoos totals = 12 cuckoos midnight!)

the next morning my husband asked me what time i got in, i told him 'midnight'... he didn’t seem pi$$ed off in the least.

whew, i got away with that one! then he said 'we need a new cuckoo clock.'

when i asked him why, he said, 'well, last night our clock cuckooed three times, then said 'oh $hit.' cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another three times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the coffee table and farted.

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Specializes in Neuro/NSGY, critical care, med/stroke/tele.

Those BOTH had me sitting here at work (on a snow day, the only one in!) giggling to myself! Wonderful!!

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Specializes in Med-Surg.
:lol2: You guys are so funny!!!.. Thanks for the laugh :yeah::p:heartbeat
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Specializes in psych, geriatrics.

Nice..... ;)

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