breakups & nursing school


Hey y'all! This is my first post, so bear with me.

I was accepted into my school's ADN program this fall...yay! I have been dreaming of this for so long. I'm so ready to tackle this new chapter of my life. there always a "but"?

I just ended a 4.5 year relationship. We both have been very civil about it all, but that definitely does not make it easy. We lived together and so I've had to move homes, say goodbye to our first dog we got together, and deal with the anxiety of hoping I'm doing the right thing for myself and my happiness. Has anyone else gone through a breakup right before or during nursing school? Right now my plan is to just immerse myself into school once it starts. I just wanted to know if going through this kind of life-change and starting a nursing program is something that is doable? If anyone has gone through this, does anyone have any advice??

thanks for reading & for any comments!

Dear god...nursing students have had wives, husbands, and children die. They have been deployed into combat and others have been diagnosed with cancer.

Whether or not a breakup with a boyfriend will severely impact the next few weeks (note I did not say years) is entirely up to you.

Specializes in Critical Care. Has 5 years experience.

My partner (who does a dangerous job) got deployed to a war zone during the final few months before nursing school started for me. That was way worse than any break-up I've ever gone through (and I've gone through some nasty ones). Yes, nursing school is totally doable during this transition. It's probably good for you to have something else to focus on anyway!


3 Posts

I didn't mean to sound melodramatic. I know I'm blessed because there could be way worse to deal with. I was just looking for advice.

Specializes in ICU. Has 12 years experience.

I left my fiance my junior year of nursing school. Never looked back. Never let a man determine your success in life. You got this.


60 Posts

Personally, I think it's a great way to get over a break up - it will consume your time so you can't dwell over it.

Specializes in Cardiac RN. Has 4 years experience.

I'm sorry about your breakup. It will be hard at times, and the anxiety is not fun to deal with, but yes, I think you can definitely do it, and you will. Have faith.

A 4.5 year relationship breakup isn't something to scoff at, and leaving your dog (dog lover, have 3:) has to be heartbreak on top of heartbreak. As the ex-wife of an airborne infantry soldier that deployed once to Iraq for a year, and once to Afghanistan for another year, I will say that our breakup and divorce was harder than the deployments. Both are frightening & painful, both hurt, both test your strength and resolve, but in two very different ways. I kept going during the deployments...I fell apart and dealt with a lot of anxiety and depression during my seperation and subsequent divorce.

You're entitled to feel your feelings and worry about how it may impact your education. Breakups are tough. I know. Hang in there. Hopefully, by the time classes start, you'll be a little more grounded and your heart will be on the mend. It takes time. It comes in waves. You will get through it and you will be stronger for it. School will help keep your mind focused on a different direction.

Best of luck to you. Chin up!


45 Posts

Life does not stop happening just because you're in nursing school. In my cohort we've had deaths of pets/friends/family, issues with roommates, breakups, near divorces, hospitalization of loved ones, and personal illnesses. Dealing with these issues while in the nursing program is absolutely doable, but definitely not easy. My advice is to make time to take care of yourself, surround yourself with people who support you, focus on your studies, and communicate with your instructors if you're beginning to struggle. You will get through it and be a stronger person for it in the end!


5 Posts

Dear god...nursing students have had wives, husbands, and children die. They have been deployed into combat and others have been diagnosed with cancer.

Whether or not a breakup with a boyfriend will severely impact the next few weeks (note I did not say years) is entirely up to you.

Thank you for showing us what a perfect example of disenfranchised grief is. I would encourage you to reevaluate your response to this type of grief. Someone will always have it worse than you but that does not mean you cannot grieve for your loss. Dating someone for almost 5 years is a significant amount of time. Especially if you lived together and had a dog together.

OP, do not let other posters make you feel bad for feeling sadness over this breakup. Breakups are hard. If it takes you two weeks or two years to get over this person that is ok. Take some time to let yourself grieve and then immerse yourself in school. Talk to a counselor or someone close to you. If you are having a hard time, just talk to your professors and let them know what is going on. Chances are they will be more understanding than you think. Time heals all wounds and you can certainly get through school while going through a breakup.


4 Posts

Currently in nursing school doing my 10 week summer semester. Week 5 my fiancé called me after lecture and broke up with me, a week before our 5 year anniversary! I am hurting terrible and sleeping/crying a lot but it's part of the grieving process for me. But I still make sure to record the lectures in case I zone out and do the required readings. It's hard but despite how I'm feeling now I have a feeling I'm going to be okay, just remember to take care of yourself. You can't pour from an empty cup!!