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Discussion

Awkwardness....what to do?

I recently started working in L&D for a few months now. During my months still on orientation, I had a SAB and was totally unaware. I was bleeding (thought it was my period) and had terrible cramping and had to go to the ER. It was confirmed I was pregnant.

Anyhow, after my ER visit, I called our OB-GYN. I went to see our OB-GYN, one that all the RNs on our unit really look up to, one that all the RNs go to (this is a pretty small hospital). I saw him only once in the office and he gladly took me in the same day I called in for an appt. I went through some blood test and a couple days later, this OB-GYN informed me it was a miscarriage over the phone. It was difficult for me... I didn't tell any of my co-workers at all. Anyways, he wanted to follow up with me again in the office the following week and had told me to called his office and set up an appt.

At the time I didn't see the reason for the follow up, only to be told the sad news again that yes it was a miscarriage. So I really didn't want to go. I wasn't sure how to tell him I didn't want the appt or see the reason why or if I shouldn't say anything and never show up. Anyways, soon enough one day on my way out of the elevator, I meet him, he seem to be in a rush, and just I abruptly blurted, "Dr. ---, I won't be making that appt...I don't think I'm going to that" And that was it! He didn't get the chance to respond and i didn't get to say anything because he seem in a hurry to go up to the unit.

Well in short, since that moment, it was been total awkwardness between us. I hope he didn't think I didn't like his service or "fired him" or what not. I just don't like the awkwardness there is now.

I'm thinking of sending a Thank you card ...maybe that will help lessen the awkwardness??? Any suggestions? :confused:

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    First of all, I'm sorry about your miscarriage. I've been there...

    I highly doubt there is an issue, but at the next check up just bring it up and mention why you did not come in.

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    • Author

    It's been a good 2 months now since my miscarriage... I don't know how I should go about it now. There is still that awkwardness though whenever I see the OB-GYN on the unit or when I'm taking care of his pt.

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    It's been a good 2 months now since my miscarriage... I don't know how I should go about it now. There is still that awkwardness though whenever I see the OB-GYN on the unit or when I'm taking care of his pt.

    I would honestly pull him aside when he has a moment and explain that you hope he didn't misunderstand and explain why you cancelled. He'll either say no worries or that he understands.

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    • Author

    You know... Idk why I didn't think of that but that sounds like a really good idea. Thanks

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    LoL. Its okay. But yea, I always get out of any akwardess by saying something rather then leaving it unspoken. I'm sure iF he did have that impression it will go away if you just mention it. Even if he doesn't he'll still respect you for adressing it.

    Good luck!

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    I agree with Aly529. I think you should talk to him about it and let him know the reason why you didn't want to go to the follow up. From his point of view, you saw him once and canceled the follow up. He could be thinking that maybe you were unhappy with him as a doctor or didn't like his care. I think the best thing you can do is just talk to him.

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    I know this is not what you want to hear, but you need to make and keep a follow up appointment. There could be problems that you are unaware of that caused the miscarriage, or even retained tissue. Please see someons as soon as possible.

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    I know this is not what you want to hear, but you need to make and keep a follow up appointment. There could be problems that you are unaware of that caused the miscarriage, or even retained tissue. Please see someons as soon as possible.

    I agree...that was my first thought...that there might be some tissue left that can really cause problems. The other posts about getting him aside and address the issue is the thing to do...then all will be taken care of when you explain why you didn't want to return. :)

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    I agree you should go get a follow up appointment. At the appointment I would explain that you were just not in a good spot emotionally to come back and hear the news. It is better that you get things taken care of now then have to deal with it later on.

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