Autistic nurse

[LindaGracie, BSN]

I have recently learned that I have autism spectrum disorder level 1 without accompanying intellectual impairment and without accompanying language impairment. I wasn't too knowledgeable about "high functioning autism" until I started researching it after seeing a psychologist for psychological testing, had asked me about suspicion of autism. I sought out testing after having PTSD type symptoms transfer from flying stinging insects (I had anaphylactic shock from 3 yellow jacket stings in July 2022) to past work issues with toxic coworkers and supervisors. I had some questions after watching the TV series The Good Doctor which was about a brilliant doctor who has autism. It was generally an upbeat show but I could relate to how he thought about things. After getting the diagnosis, I thought that the autism explains a lot of the problems I struggled with throughout my life and why I always felt different. 

How does autism affect my work as a nurse (and as a counselor)? I struggle socially (I'm not into gossip and strongly believe gossip is morally wrong). I don't do office politics. God created us all the same and I treat everyone as equals. This doesn't set well with those in authority with oversized egos. I take my role of patient advocacy seriously and do advocate for my patients and clients, even if it means "bucking the system". I truly work as unto the Lord. My strong sense of moral justice kicks in. I don't believe in cutting corners. Yes, I do the nursing assessments on my patients when I worked in the hospital. Very few nurses do the nursing assessments (I'm speaking from both the nurse prospective and from the patient prospective. Yes, I was a frequent flyer in 2022. I had aortic valve replacement surgery in March, small bowel obstruction in May, and anaphylactic shock in July.) Outside of ICU, I only had a couple of nurses who actually did the nursing assessment on me yet I know they documented that they did the assessment in Cerna. Since I did the nursing assessments and administered the medications coupled with my slow processing speed and attention span issues, I took too long in the patients' rooms. I don't take negative criticism too well (Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria). This puts a target for bullying on my back for those nurses who "eat their young". I am bothered by the inability to administer medications in the 2 hour window while working in a SNF which included tube feedings, crushing pills for residents who couldn't swallow their pills, nebulizer treatments, and searching for missing medications that weren't in the med cart. I couldn't initial that I administered a medication that I wasn't available. I finally asked the resident, who was cognizant enough to know if he had been getting his eye drops. He said he hasn't gotten his eye drops in 2 weeks! Yet it was documented that he had been getting the eye drops everyday! I struggle with frustration of not being able to get all the medications administered in the 2 hour window which later I learned that none of the nurses got it all done in the 2 hour window. Yet DHEC inspectors and management believes and expect it to be done in the 2 hour window. Anyway, I finally found an agency where I feel appreciated, needed and can excel at. Being autistic has a lot of challenges but I also learned that some things I am in the superior range of ability. Therefore I am an advocate for the ADA and mental health.

[Journey_On, BSN, RN]

Thank you for sharing. I can relate to some of the things you wrote - such as performing nursing assessments, having RSD, and spending too much time in patient rooms, which leads to me feeling more behind than my coworkers. I also feel a strong need to check things off my brain sheet thoroughly and double-checking things before leaving for the day. I am a level 1, low support autistic. I don't have any accommodations at work and wouldn't even know what to ask for, for fear of being given special treatment or something. 

I appreciate you sharing! 

[LindaGracie, BSN]

Hi Journey-On,

Thank you for sharing. Do you struggle with a slow processing speed and working memory issues? I think these 2 areas are my biggest issues that interfere with my job performance 😔 because it always seems to take me longer to pull meds from the pixie and Omni Cell which usually brought on sarcastic comments. I would always double and triple check because my brain does funky things and I feel horrible whenever I made a medication error. It's hard for me to bounce back. However, since having all my health issues in 2022, I'm no longer doing direct patient care.

[Journey_On, BSN, RN]

@LindaGracie, no problem! I don't think I have slow processing speed or working memory. I do, however, tend to double and triple check things, as well as other things. If I have a student with me, I tend to get anxiety at first because I want to teach and make sure they have a good experience but at the same time not let things slow me down (as I already have issues with time management).

I am sorry for your health issues. I'm glad the agency job seems like a better fit for you, though. The bedside is very unaccommodating for folks with disabilities like ours.