Anybody else out there feel like a failure???

Justanotherday · Feb 16, 2010

Hmmmm...why are your children up so late that you only get 3-4 hours of sleep? And what time are you getting up?

If the three younger ones are up past 8:30 or so, I would work on that if you can. Spend a half hour with your hubby, then hit the books from 9-11 pm. Getting up at 6 a.m. would give you 7 hours of sleep.

Is your 13 year old given chores to do? What kind of things does he do for you? If you are trying to "do it all", well, guess what? You can't. Let the 5 year old dust, have the 2 year old help you pick up toys, hand the 13 year old a vacuum, stick the 2 and 1 year olds in the bathtub while you clean the toilet. Get the family working together. Never go to bed without starting the washing machine, then toss the clothes in the dryer when you get up. Fold that load after breakfast. Then PLAN DINNER. Start something in the crock pot, take something out to defrost, brown some hamburger meat, whatever you can do. I used to get a lot of stuff done with my babies in a backpack carrier.

I don't know what your typical day's schedule is...sorry....these are some things that have helped me keep life sane when I am pulled in too many directions.

CBsMommy · Feb 16, 2010

Hang in there Sherri! I am in my first semester and cannot believe how much work it is! Just take it one day at a time and you will get through this. If you can, follow the suggestions above and set aside a little time for your husband (even just a half an hour at night). On really crazy days, I throw something frozen in the oven and sit down for dinner with my son (so he feels connected with me). His bathtime is 7 (I do homework while he plays in the bath) and his bedtime is at 8. I throw in a load of laundry before I study, study until 10 or so, and then throw the load in the dryer before I lay down. It is a lot of sacrifice but it's not forever! Good luck and hang in there!

latonyad34 · Feb 16, 2010

Bless your heart. I have only a four year old son and raising him feels like overload. I also have a boyfriend who I am not really too much am not concerned with because my goal is to do well in school. Whilst I don't have as much on my plate as it sounds like you do, I can offer that I am highly ADD and have had to learn a new way of managing my time. I struggle with not feeling good enough from time to time since I started my first semester. I just tell myself I'm good enough, and I work to stay on top of my time management.

With my son, I've noticed that if I can give him quality minutes, he is good to go. Right now I am on the couch studying.....okay I diverted here for a minute......he is on the floor playing with blocks. Every hour or so he comes for hugs and kisses. I stop what I am doing to indulge him. That lasts for literally a minute or less. I know you have the 1 year old who probably requires more of mommy, but if you can remind yourself that those moments for your children don't take up much time and they are quality filled that mommy guilt goes away. Huge in my schedule, I had to move dinner up early. I was good for cooking at 6 or 7 which got him into bed later. I have to start at around 4 or 5 now. Stick to your simple favorite meals so you can keep cooking healthy meals but that don't require much prep and cooking time. I had a nurse tell me that her children ate chicken nuggets and hot dogs through her schooling, but to remember it won't always be that way.

Bathtime comes immediately after dinner. I like to have him finished by 6:30 or 7 so he can start winding down. He's in bed between 7:30 and 8. There is no getting out of bed. I begin studying shortly thereafter until I'm tired and just go to bed.

I study a chapter and then notes from lecture and pharm.Then I do some questions from my NCLEX practice. I realized after my first test that it's easy to overstudy. If you can learn to compartmentalize and focus on just the objectives, you can minimize study time and make it more effective.

As far as chores, sounds like your husband and 13 year old can pitch in. For me, laundry waits until Saturday and Sunday if I don't necessarily need to wash during the week. A tidy not so much clean house works for me, because I have more pressing things to worry about. I hope I helped a bit. Breaking everything into their own individualized tasks has been key for me. Good luck.