Hello all and thank you to all who share their wonderful stories,
After spending much time reading and learning from others stories, I will now post my own now because I'm in need of advice.
I am about to start my 2nd year in my 2 year RN program in a couple of weeks. I have only been married a year. I started my RN program last fall. Last year during my first semester, my husband was laid off at the end of the year. Shortly after, we found out on Christmas that his mother has stage 4 Ampullary cancer. It had spread in her body. Surgery was not an option. Chemo would only be to stabilize the cancer. She was given 3-6 months, tops a year. She began chemo in February. Since then, she is now on the third type of treatment because the others weren't very effective.
Meanwhile, my husband took a job an hour and a half away because there were no jobs for him where we live. He would stay with his mom near his job and come home on the weekend. In May my husband was diagnosed with a rare skin disease called Pemphigus Vulgaris which is a skin disease where your skin thinks a certain protein is foreign to it and attacks itself. He is doing much better but now on a ton of medication.
My mother-n-law is now having difficulties where she lives and has asked to come live with us. I just found this news out yesterday. I am concerned for several reasons. She is not doing well and I see her slowly declining. It is heart breaking. We live in a one bedroom apartment and now we are looking into a 2 bedroom. I am about to start my third semester of nursing school soon. My husband only comes home on the weekend and I will be the one looking after his mother during the week.
What should I expect caring for someone in the 4th stage of cancer? Do they need someone to be looking after them all the time? What signs or symptoms should I look for that show her cancer is progressing? She has already slowed down tremendously. She is always tired, has nausea and vomiting sometimes, fevers here and there, her appetite has decreased quite a bit, and she sleeps all day. How can you have any idea of how long these symptoms will last? What other symptoms may show her worsening?
She doesn't want to do things that can help her like take tylenol or do her breathing treatment. What can I do at home to make her most comfortable? Do you think it will be possible to look after someone in her condition while going to nursing school? How will it be when things start to get really bad? I know it is going to be extremely rough, however, I just want to know more less what to expect so I can prepare myself. The chemo doesn't seem to be working and we are already in the 8 month since she was diagnosed.
Needless to say, it has been a rough first year of marriage.
ANY and ALL advice with how to deal with my situation would be extremely helpful. I want to be successful in nursing school, but this is family which comes first. Thank you.
